Chasing Miracles - Fantasy [Last Post - Updated] Try Nth! XD

Share your blood sweat tears query for feedback and lend your hard-won expertise to others
User avatar
sierramcconnell
Posts: 670
Joined: August 23rd, 2010, 10:28 pm
Location: BG, KY
Contact:

Chasing Miracles - Fantasy [Last Post - Updated] Try Nth! XD

Post by sierramcconnell » August 27th, 2010, 3:20 pm

I totally am horrible at this. My book is so plotfilled and twisty with sub-stuff that it's hard to smoosh it down into one little letter. I have been reading websites and books and I still have never been great at condensing and answering that question of "what's it about". So here goes nothing...! I've had about three or four versions that everyone hated. I don't like this one either. XD

[Addresses]

[Dear Agent,]

[Paragraph tailored to fit agent\publisher. Such as where I found them and so on.]

A genius with clockwork mechanics, Carmine Caudatus reanimated his best friend Thomas when he was but eight-years-old. Four years later, near the end of a Fallen Watcher’s contract, twelve-year-old Carmine Caudatus is ready to restore Thomas back to full life. But things are complicated when they are attacked by the Angel of Regeneration and accused of being abominations set to be put down by God’s order. With the final request of his contractor close at hand, Carmine has but six months to make good or lose his soul and that of his friend.

Chasing Miracles is a Christian inspired, Steampunk fantasy complete around 111,000 words. I hope you will consider my request and I thank you for your time.
Last edited by sierramcconnell on September 25th, 2010, 9:22 am, edited 3 times in total.
I'm on Tumblr!

The blog died...but so did I...and now I'm alive again! OMG.

User avatar
oldhousejunkie
Posts: 250
Joined: March 16th, 2010, 10:15 am
Location: South Carolina
Contact:

Re: Chasing Miracles - Christian Fantasy

Post by oldhousejunkie » August 27th, 2010, 5:12 pm

Ok, here's what jumped out at me. First, you're way too hard on yourself. Chin up, ok? :-)

Second, I was raised on Christian fiction, and I don't think this would qualify. I think it's just a fantasy with religious overtones or a religious fantasy. But that's just my opinion. I hope that doesn't offend--I've had people tell me that my book is a historical romance, and that really ticked me off, because it isn't. But anyhoo...

Third, I actually think you have shortened your query too much. I'm not a fantasy reader, and so I often have a hard time reading the multi-paragraph queries, much less one that encapsulates the entire plot into one paragraph. I don't know if you read Query Shark, but she says that you should shoot for at least 250 words in a query, and they don't need to be wasted on preliminaries, where you found the agent, etc. Although I take that advice with a grain of salt because of some agents seem to like that sort of thing.

Fourth, I'm really confused by your query. Maybe a very short intro on how we came to be in a world where people are run on clockworks? And who is the Fallen Watcher? Does he even have to be mentioned? I think in general, you should focus on one character, maybe two at most--you mention four. I don't understand why Carmine reanimated his friend at 8 and then reanimates him again later on. The first bit is great--"A genius with clockwork mechanics, Carmine Caudatus..." I would change the end to something more generic....maybe the intro. Something like, "Carmine Caudatus lives in a world where people can be reanimated, etc."

And finally, I would re-think the title. It just doesn't seem to jive with what little information that I read in your query. It sounds like a book in a totally different genre. But that's just my two cents.

Best of luck to you!

User avatar
sierramcconnell
Posts: 670
Joined: August 23rd, 2010, 10:28 pm
Location: BG, KY
Contact:

Re: Chasing Miracles - Christian Fantasy

Post by sierramcconnell » August 27th, 2010, 5:34 pm

This is the problem I'm having. I'm having issues representing an entire 111,000 word novel in one page. I've never been one for summaries. I don't know how to get it condensed down considering there are so many characters. It's multi-pov, but centered around this one person. It goes from the plot of Carmine trying to rescue his friend to a plot to stop the Fallen Watchers from destroying Heaven.

I just don't know what to do. I've read the internet and looked at books. I have one here right now but unfortunately I seem to run across too many romance flavored letters. I don't have any romance in my book. The other forum told me I needed to find one plot point and focus on it. But there isn't just one direct one.

Basically it's this: He's kidnapped at eight and his friend (who is also his servant) is killed. So once released he reanimates him using a power only his family has, but unfortunately that's just the body. To get the soul a Watcher tricks him. But it turns out that it was actually a demon. (Am I supposed to reveal that to the agent? That's a big later development.)

They're at the end of the contract, about to get the final item in this list they've been charged with. This has taken four years, almost five to complete. Five is all they're given. They think they're almost done. Then an angel tries to kill them at the request of God. They escape because Thomas is beginning to fall to the unholy power that was used to revive him, and his body is entering decay. They get home, they leave to get the final item, and then they meet another couple of characters, one an angel and the other a demon in reform. Who are sworn to protect them at the request of God.

So now he's even more confused. Not to mention being told he's actually not human, but Nephilim, descended by the Watchers that he has been serving this whole time. Oh, and now a couple have been released to finish an airship that is supposed to go to Heaven to start a war. And he was the one to gather the items.

But I have no idea how to put it in one page.

Okay, I tried again. It's probably worse though! [cringe]

[Addresses]

[Dear Agent,]

[Paragraph tailored to fit agent\publisher. Such as where I found them and so on.]

When Carmine Caudatus was eight-years-old, he lost his best friend and servant to murder. With the Power of the Rose, a gift only descendants of his mother's line carry, he attempted to use his genius mind to reanimate Thomas with clockworks. However, without a soul, a body is just an empty vessel, and he was forced to open a contract with the Fallen Watcher Bezaliel for his friend's life to be restored.

But it was just a temporary measure. Carmine was tasked with the collection of the Artifacts of the Angel's Airship and given five years to complete his mission. If he does not succeed, his soul and that of Thomas is forfeit. Now, four years later, he is nearing the end of his contract and has but one final artifact to claim. The Wheel of Fate.

Matters are complicated when there are not only angels against Carmine, threatening to cull him and his friend for being "abominations to the Lord", but also the truth of his existence and the real power he holds. As he races against time to save Thomas, he uncovers a plot that has been generations in the making, and that he might have to learn to let go of what he has held onto so tightly.

Chasing Miracles is a Christian-inspired, Steampunk fantasy complete around 111,000 words. I hope you will consider my request and I thank you for your time.
I'm on Tumblr!

The blog died...but so did I...and now I'm alive again! OMG.

User avatar
oldhousejunkie
Posts: 250
Joined: March 16th, 2010, 10:15 am
Location: South Carolina
Contact:

Re: Chasing Miracles - Christian Fantasy

Post by oldhousejunkie » August 27th, 2010, 6:01 pm

MUCH better. My brain didn't implode with confusion, so that's always a good sign. :-)
sierramcconnell wrote:When Carmine Caudatus was eight-years-old, he lost his best friend and servant to murder. Good! Eye-catching. With the Power of the Rose, a gift only descendants of his mother's line carry that might be too much information. Maybe kill the part about his mother's line, etc., he attempted to use his genius mind to reanimate Thomas with clockworks. However, without a soul, a body is just an empty vessel, and he was forced to open a contract with the Fallen Watcher Bezaliel for his friend's life to be restored.

But it was just a temporary measure. Kill this. Carmine was tasked with the collection of the Artifacts of the Angel's Airship and given five years to complete his mission. If he does not succeed, his soul and that of Thomas is forfeit. Now, four years later, he is nearing the end of his contract and has but one final artifact to claim. The Wheel of Fate.

Matters are complicated when there are not only angels against Carmine, threatening to cull too flowery..."kill" is just fine.him and his friend for being "abominations to the Lord", but also the truth of his existence and the real power he holds. As he races against time to save Thomas, he uncovers a plot that has been generations in the making, and that he might have to learn to let go of what he has held onto so tightly this last part is kind of ambiguous. I have trouble with last lines too. :-).

Chasing Miracles is a Christian-inspired, Steampunk fantasy complete around 111,000 words. I hope you will consider my request and I thank you for your time.

User avatar
sierramcconnell
Posts: 670
Joined: August 23rd, 2010, 10:28 pm
Location: BG, KY
Contact:

Re: Chasing Miracles - Christian Fantasy

Post by sierramcconnell » August 27th, 2010, 6:11 pm

Oohkay. How about this:

[Addresses]

[Dear Agent,]

[Paragraph tailored to fit agent\publisher. Such as where I found them and so on.]

When Carmine Caudatus was eight-years-old, he lost his best friend and servant to murder. With the Power of the Rose and his genius mind, he attempted to reanimate Thomas with clockworks. However, without a soul, a body is just an empty vessel, and he was forced to open a contract with the Fallen Watcher Bezaliel for his friend's life to be restored.

Carmine was tasked with the collection of the Artifacts of the Angel's Airship and given five years to complete his mission. If he does not succeed, his soul and that of Thomas is forfeit. Now, four years later, he is nearing the end of his contract and has but one final artifact to claim. The Wheel of Fate.

Matters are complicated when there are not only angels against Carmine, threatening to kill him and his friend for being "abominations to the Lord", but also the truth of his existence and the real power he holds. As he races against time to save Thomas he uncovers a plot that has been generations in the making, and that everything is but a tool for the Lord.

Chasing Miracles is a Christian-inspired, Steampunk fantasy complete around 111,000 words. I hope you will consider my request and I thank you for your time.

---

And I thank you for helping me. You're much kinder about it than the others were over on the other, nameless forum. I felt ripped. ; . ;
I'm on Tumblr!

The blog died...but so did I...and now I'm alive again! OMG.

User avatar
TigerGray
Posts: 74
Joined: August 24th, 2010, 5:19 pm
Contact:

Re: Chasing Miracles - Christian Fantasy

Post by TigerGray » August 27th, 2010, 7:11 pm

sierramcconnell wrote:I totally am horrible at this. My book is so plotfilled and twisty with sub-stuff that it's hard to smoosh it down into one little letter. I have been reading websites and books and I still have never been great at condensing and answering that question of "what's it about". So here goes nothing...! I've had about three or four versions that everyone hated. I don't like this one either. XD

[Addresses]

[Dear Agent,]

[Paragraph tailored to fit agent\publisher. Such as where I found them and so on.]

I would put this stuff at the bottom, but different strokes for different agents

A genius with clockwork mechanics, Carmine Caudatus reanimated his best friend Thomas when he was but eight-years-old.
I love this as a hook, despite some mild confusion about which "he" you're referring to.


Four years later, near the end of a Fallen Watcher’s contract, twelve-year-old Carmine Caudatus is ready to restore Thomas back to full life. But things are complicated when they are attacked by the Angel of Regeneration and accused of being abominations set to be put down by God’s order. With the final request of his contractor close at hand, Carmine has but six months to make good or lose his soul and that of his friend.

I think expanding on this would help. I read your second attempt but decided to comment here because you had things--like the hook--that I wanted to make a case for you keeping. However, I think a lot of what you did in your second try is worth holding on to. For example, this could be expanded. If there's an order of animators, why is Carmine the one getting called out? Fallen Watcher's contract implies to me some sort of guild. I love the name Angel of Regeneration. It implies to me that maybe there's a new twist on the angel mythos. That interests me.

Chasing Miracles is a Christian inspired, Steampunk fantasy complete around 111,000 words. I hope you will consider my request and I thank you for your time.
I would leave out the Christian inspired bit, for a couple of reasons. Christian is its own genre in the publishing business and it's a good idea to avoid genre confusion. Further, lots of fantasy authors write about angels, demons, etc and it's still considered fantasy, so I would go with that given the plot doesn't sound especially faith based/driven.
"Who knows themselves better than the blind?' - for every thought becomes a tool." --Luis Borges

http://tigergray.blogspot.com/

User avatar
a3writer
Posts: 23
Joined: August 23rd, 2010, 5:12 am
Location: In the black
Contact:

Re: Chasing Miracles - Christian Fantasy

Post by a3writer » August 28th, 2010, 6:58 pm

When Carmine Caudatus was eight-years-old, he lost his best friend and servant to murder. With the Power of the Rose and his genius mind, he attempted to reanimate Thomas with clockworks. However, without a soul, a body is just an empty vessel, and he was forced to open a contract with the Fallen Watcher Bezaliel for his friend's life to be restored.

Carmine was tasked with the collection of the Artifacts of the Angel's Airship and given five years to complete his mission. If he does not succeed, his soul and that of Thomas is forfeit. Now, four years later,
This is where the story begins. Above is just backstory that you should weave into the story. Carmine has almost completed the quest to save his best friend. he is nearing the end of his contract with the Fallen Watcher Bezaliel, and has but one final artifact to claim. The Wheel of Fate. And then you would say it's taken him five years to do it, etc.

I think this paragraph needs to be restructured a bit, mostly because you need to work in the backstory. Something like "Reanimating Thomas with clockworks is seen as an 'abomination to the Lord" so angels are hunting Carmine. Matters are complicated when there are not only angels against Carmine, threatening to kill him and his friend for being "abominations to the Lord", but also the truth of his existence and the real power he holds. As he races against time to save Thomas he uncovers a plot that has been generations in the making, and that everything is but a tool for the Lord. I'm really not sure what to make of this. It doesn't have any real meaning. What's the plot? As it is this reminds me of "The Lord works in mysterious ways" which may be true, but it doesn't sell a book.

Chasing Miracles is a Christian-inspired, Steampunk fantasy completearound 111,000 words. I hope you will consider my request and I thank you for your time. A lot of people are talking about the Christian-inspired, and all I'll add is be sure you know your market. To me this talks about Christian themes heavily, but I'm not so sure it's not a mainstream book. If you use Christian in your query, the agents you look at may just respond with a "I don't represent Christian" as it is an entirely different market.

Brendanjparedes
Posts: 14
Joined: February 15th, 2010, 3:08 pm
Contact:

Re: Chasing Miracles - Christian Fantasy

Post by Brendanjparedes » August 29th, 2010, 3:14 pm

OHJ and a3writer both seem to hit upon the bi points, Sierra - and OHJ, sorry I made that reference about your book, it's just how the query sounded to me. Christian Fantasy conjures images of more overt Christian Themes, which I really didn't get in this query. I think you might be better served to just call it steampunk, sinc eyou don't up with dolts like me wondering, "Where's the Christian theme in this?" That is unless you do have huge Christian themes in it, in which case I'd come at this a bit differently.

All of us are beating our heads against our keyboards trying to condence anywhere from 100K to 130K down to a couple of interesting paragraphs. OHJ is right that you are way too hard on yourself. Folks around here know the pain you are going through and understand. So relax, you are among friends. On that score, maybe you might want to come at this from a different angle - and I've been trying this one myself with mixed results - Tell us the story. Skip the back story, they are right, that will come in the book. Just tell us what this is about. I was at a seminar years ago where a screenwriter was talking about how you pitch a script which I use occasionally to develop plotlines: Tell me what the story is about in one sentence, then three sentences, then a paragraph, then three paragraphs. Don't worry about the back story, tell me this one.

It might help, it might not. Personally I think who ever came up with the "Query Letter" did so to torture would be writers and cut down on their query mail, but I'm a cynic at heart... still... hopefully that helps you. I know I grew a lot happier with my query letter drafts when I took that route, even if I am still breaking keyboards with my head - reminds me I have to go to Best Buy today. It might get you closer to what you need. I like the general story.

Hope this helps.

Brendan

User avatar
sierramcconnell
Posts: 670
Joined: August 23rd, 2010, 10:28 pm
Location: BG, KY
Contact:

Re: Chasing Miracles - Christian Fantasy

Post by sierramcconnell » August 29th, 2010, 4:07 pm

But the blogs and books I've read tell me that I have to include a backstory. I'm so confused. Everyone is telling me to do it differently. If I told it in one sentence, you'd lose the entire book.

A boy suffering under the consequences of a genius mind is trapped with the choice of saving his friend or saving the world.

Which pretty much makes it sound like every other book out there. BOORING.

Three sentences is where it gets tricky. I just don't know what to put there. Do you need to know about the contract? Do you need to know about the angel, Rehael, trying to kill him? Do you need to know about the meddling God who takes human form and follows people around? Do you need to know about the fact that Carmine's actually a Nephilim, and that his whole line is descended from the bad guy? Or that his mother knows because her family had her wed Carmine's father to produce him on purpose? I can't really tell you that, because it's a big plot point. But would the agent need to know that?

It just really hurts to think that I spent a year on this and it's wonderful. But it'll never get in print because of one stupid letter I can't write properly.
I'm on Tumblr!

The blog died...but so did I...and now I'm alive again! OMG.

User avatar
a3writer
Posts: 23
Joined: August 23rd, 2010, 5:12 am
Location: In the black
Contact:

Re: Chasing Miracles - Christian Fantasy

Post by a3writer » August 29th, 2010, 4:34 pm

Yes, you do need backstory. We need to know the why of the whole quest, but you don't want to do an infodump at the beginning. Doing an infodump is a lot like a prologue, which is something else agents aren't crazy about. Weave the backstory into the query. Make sure you start off with where the real story actually begins, which is near the end of the quest, not five years ago.

Yes, we need to know about the contract. Yes we need to know about Rehael (mention him in the query as he is one of the antagonists). The others I would skip. Those are reveals of the plot which goes into the synopsis. A query doesn't explain the whole plot. It's just what we need to know if we want to read more. Think about the back cover of the book. It's that really short summary that gets us to actually open the book and read more. If you overload with backstory and detail, we're overwhelmed without understanding what's going on.

We're all with you that it's hard. I don't think any of us would be on these forums if we weren't all in the same boat, but you'll get it if you keep trying. I highly recommend reading the QueryShark : http://queryshark.blogspot.com/. And by reading, I mean read every single query posted, and make revisions to yours along the way.

Keep at it!

User avatar
sierramcconnell
Posts: 670
Joined: August 23rd, 2010, 10:28 pm
Location: BG, KY
Contact:

Re: Chasing Miracles - Christian Fantasy

Post by sierramcconnell » August 29th, 2010, 6:13 pm

I read there. I understand what they're doing and everything. It doesn't matter because the words are getting in the way.

I keep writing and rewriting, and there's always that voice going, "Nope, nope. They're going to say you can't do that line there. You can't do that one, because of this. You can't do this one because of this." and so on. I keep editing it because of everyone who's looked at the other letters.

Is there someone I can pay to do this for me? I can't. I totally and completely can't. And the more I try the worse it gets, just like when I tried so hard to write before and ended up with two years of panic attacks.

Carmine Caudatus has never been one to give up his toys. A genius at clockwork animation, Carmine can invent beautiful creations and bring them to life all with a single breath from his lips.

But when his plan to reanimate his best friend Thomas fails, he enters into a contract with the Fallen Watcher Bezaliel. Carmine is given five years to gather thirteen artifacts or he will forfeit both of their souls.


I start and then it just falls apart. Because I'm inadequate. Everything I try to add to it...be it about Rehael or the artifacts, I keep hearing it in my head...

Matters are complicated when an Angel of Regeneration, Rehael, comes to claim them for judgment.
Is this important? Do you really need to mention him? He's not a big character.

But he is, this is a multi POV. So I try this way...

When he learns of his lineage in the search for the thirteenth item, Carmine discovers a family secret that has been guarded for generations.
Wow, that was fast. All 13 items were suddenly collected and ONE guy finds out a secret no one else was able to?

Damnit. >.<

So here is my problem. I can't do it because I'm being freaked out by everything I've learned. I think I'll leave it at this for now.

[Addresses]

[Dear Agent,]

[Paragraph tailored to fit agent\publisher. Such as where I found them and so on.] (QueryShark says to put it at the bottom? Almost everything else says the top?)

Carmine Caudatus has never been one to give up his toys. A genius at clockwork animation, Carmine can invent beautiful creations and bring them to life all with a single breath from his lips.

But when his plan to reanimate his best friend Thomas fails, he enters into a contract with the Fallen Watcher Bezaliel. Carmine is given five years to gather thirteen artifacts or he will forfeit both of their souls.

Matters are complicated when an Angel of Regeneration, Rehael, comes to claim them for judgment. Thomas protects them, but does so at the cost of his mind. With every use of his dark power, he will fall further into madness, eventually turning on that which created him.

Now left with only six months to his contract and being hunted by judgmental angels, Carmine must make a decision between the friend he has been keeping alive and a Heaven he may never reach.

Chasing Miracles is a [genre] complete around 111,000 words. I hope you will consider my request and I look forward to working with you.
I'm on Tumblr!

The blog died...but so did I...and now I'm alive again! OMG.

Write2Me
Posts: 40
Joined: August 25th, 2010, 12:46 pm
Contact:

Re: Chasing Miracles - Christian Fantasy

Post by Write2Me » August 29th, 2010, 6:30 pm

Don't be so hard on yourself. The agents are already going to give you enough grief when your samples, synopsis, query combos are answered by "not for me." lol. I certainly have gotten enough no's to understand how crappy it feels. I have a couple suggestions.

1. it doesnt seem like a Christian fantasy, so don't try to make it an apple an orange. Very few agents deal with Christian books, and you don't want to narrow the scope of agents you can query like that. Mind you, books like harry potter, the golden compass and others have religious themes weaved in, and were just plain ole fantasy books. If there's religion in it, that's fine. Unless its actually something religious, don't lock yourself into such a niche market unless its really, really aimed at that market 100% b/c those publishers are different from commercial publishers. Steampunk and Christian don't really go together. Just make it urban fantasy, thats what it sounds like.

2. 100,000 words is a death knell for a debut author. It doesnt matter if you've written Harry Potter times 20, its just not gonna happen in today's world. It took rick riordan 3 years to get percy jackson out and that was around 80,000 words. The most you could get away with is 84,000 b/c thats what jk wrote. I would suggest splitting the book into a two parter, with each part around 50k to 60k a book. My fantasy was around 85k, and now its 64k. Check out this sage piece of selling craftiness posted by nicholas sparks, author of the mega-hit, the notebook, in his query for the book.

" In addition, at 52,000 words, it is short enough not to be cost-prohibitive to most publishing houses." http://www.nicholassparks.com/ForWriters.asp?PageID=5

Your book is just too big of a risk for a publisher to take on a new writer, unless you've gotten some big writing awards or you have something amazing to sell yourself, that suggest there will be a throng of people wanting your book.

3. stop freaking out. My first query was beyond crap, so was my second, third, fourth. I think the 5th copy was where i finally started to get somewhere. I'm on my 11th version now, and its still far from perfect. Nicholas sparks said he went through 17 drafts, and he had serious writing chops, so don't feel sorry for yourself. You need to check out successful samples.

http://www.yahighway.com/search/label/querying

check out the agents comments on these queries. This provides good insight into the mind of the people you have to sell your concept to.

4. mention age. People need to know what your demographic is. but you'll see that if you check out the link above.

User avatar
TigerGray
Posts: 74
Joined: August 24th, 2010, 5:19 pm
Contact:

Re: Chasing Miracles - Christian Fantasy

Post by TigerGray » August 29th, 2010, 6:38 pm

#2 I disagree. It's fantasy and fantasy has a little more leeway. What I have read suggests it can push 120k, though the shorter the better, of course.


50k is also too short for most places. 80k--120k
"Who knows themselves better than the blind?' - for every thought becomes a tool." --Luis Borges

http://tigergray.blogspot.com/

User avatar
sierramcconnell
Posts: 670
Joined: August 23rd, 2010, 10:28 pm
Location: BG, KY
Contact:

Re: Chasing Miracles - Christian Fantasy

Post by sierramcconnell » August 29th, 2010, 6:46 pm

Write2Me wrote:Don't be so hard on yourself. The agents are already going to give you enough grief when your samples, synopsis, query combos are answered by "not for me." lol. I certainly have gotten enough no's to understand how crappy it feels. I have a couple suggestions.

1. it doesnt seem like a Christian fantasy, so don't try to make it an apple an orange. Very few agents deal with Christian books, and you don't want to narrow the scope of agents you can query like that. Mind you, books like harry potter, the golden compass and others have religious themes weaved in, and were just plain ole fantasy books. If there's religion in it, that's fine. Unless its actually something religious, don't lock yourself into such a niche market unless its really, really aimed at that market 100% b/c those publishers are different from commercial publishers. Steampunk and Christian don't really go together. Just make it urban fantasy, thats what it sounds like.

2. 100,000 words is a death knell for a debut author. It doesnt matter if you've written Harry Potter times 20, its just not gonna happen in today's world. It took rick riordan 3 years to get percy jackson out and that was around 80,000 words. The most you could get away with is 84,000 b/c thats what jk wrote. I would suggest splitting the book into a two parter, with each part around 50k to 60k a book. My fantasy was around 85k, and now its 64k. Check out this sage piece of selling craftiness posted by nicholas sparks, author of the mega-hit, the notebook, in his query for the book.

" In addition, at 52,000 words, it is short enough not to be cost-prohibitive to most publishing houses." http://www.nicholassparks.com/ForWriters.asp?PageID=5

Your book is just too big of a risk for a publisher to take on a new writer, unless you've gotten some big writing awards or you have something amazing to sell yourself, that suggest there will be a throng of people wanting your book.

3. stop freaking out. My first query was beyond crap, so was my second, third, fourth. I think the 5th copy was where i finally started to get somewhere. I'm on my 11th version now, and its still far from perfect. Nicholas sparks said he went through 17 drafts, and he had serious writing chops, so don't feel sorry for yourself. You need to check out successful samples.

http://www.yahighway.com/search/label/querying

check out the agents comments on these queries. This provides good insight into the mind of the people you have to sell your concept to.

4. mention age. People need to know what your demographic is. but you'll see that if you check out the link above.
I can't shrink my story. That's just not going to happen because there would be too much lost. Of everyone who's read it (ages were mixed but mostly adult) they've loved it, and couldn't put it down. These are random people on the internet who chose to read it because of my ridiculous synopsis in a beta post. There have been about fifteen of them that I know of.

I already know now it's probably not Christian fantasy. Which is sad because of all the Christian elements. I guess to get a message out you have to "party with the tax collectors". XD

Yes, I'm hard on myself. If I keep myself down I don't have to worry about the fall when someone pushes me. If you fall from a pedestal, it hurts a lot worse than if you just trip. So I'm sorry I'm very negative on myself.
TigerGray wrote:#2 I disagree. It's fantasy and fantasy has a little more leeway. What I have read suggests it can push 120k, though the shorter the better, of course.


50k is also too short for most places. 80k--120k
Thank you, Tiger Gray! I had read that YA fiction\fiction is anywhere from 80-125 (if it's good enough) on another blog and I'm glad I'm not the only one who got that bit of information. I had been so sad when someone said my book was too long. Then I read and found that if it's good enough, size doesn't matter in some cases. And since it looks like the next big wave might be in the direction I'm writing (I hope I'm right!), the subject matter might be enough of a boost for me.

If only I could blurb.
I'm on Tumblr!

The blog died...but so did I...and now I'm alive again! OMG.

User avatar
TigerGray
Posts: 74
Joined: August 24th, 2010, 5:19 pm
Contact:

Re: Chasing Miracles - Christian Fantasy

Post by TigerGray » August 29th, 2010, 6:52 pm

No problem. 100,00 strikes me as acceptable, certainly. Don't worry. You will get the format down. We all will, if we keep trying.
"Who knows themselves better than the blind?' - for every thought becomes a tool." --Luis Borges

http://tigergray.blogspot.com/

Post Reply

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: Bing [Bot], Majestic-12 [Bot] and 0 guests