Nathan Bransford - The Forums

I know this query will need an intro, word count, and a closing, but I am focusing on the main event. I look forward to your comments. Dara McBride fears that her former son-in-law, Michael the Drunkard, knows the secret she intends to take to her grave. hmm taking secrets to the grave is a bit cli...

Thank you both very much for your feedback; I'm currently re-drafting :) Again, thanks! -Callum. No problem! But do consider breaking it down into slightly smaller passages. I really think it is easier to get feedback when your excerpts are a bit more bite-sized. Oh and belindasmith I assure you I ...

I also understood it as gray/grey being a US/UK division. That being said, I do point out when Americans are using "grey" whether or not they want to change it is up to them.

I have also been scolded for using grey, being an American. But have to agree, grey just looks better to me.

So Booksie is a website for writers where you can post excerpts - short stories, poetry, even chapters of a novel. Readers can comment and like and track authors they are interested in.

Here is the link:
http://www.booksie.com/index.html

A chapter introducing one of the main characters; Gary Sheppard. If things make you go 'uh, what?' it is either a) meant to do that b) or is explained in either a later/earlier chapter. Any feedback is muchos appreciated. Thanks, Callum. The Crucifix killer (2000) The blood dripped silently from th...

Wow, many thanks for all the notes. I agree with many of them. I have decided to take a break from picking at it and let some one else take a stab. As far as Texas county. There is a county in Oklahoma called Texas County, which is the area the story takes place. Her hand is not broken, just very t...

"We don't want to be wakin' the youngin's, Becka. Maybe we should talk outside," Hank said. He felt maybe saw instead of felt? because he cant literally or figuratively "feel" her hopelessness the hopelessness in her eyes, the despair in the way her shoulders hunched against the...

So I recently decided to create a profile on Booksie and posted a small excerpt from an older manuscript I have completed. At first, I was excited about the prospect of sharing my work with a large readership. However, loading problems, formatting issues, and the search parameters of the site quickl...

[quote="sldwyer"]A hot, angry wind blew across the ravaged land, scorching layer upon layer of once fertile earth. Obliterating man, beast, and vegetation from what they once were and what they could have been. <-- this is a sentence fragment, (not that we arent allowed to break the rules ...

I agree with Hyaline that you could actually make this a little longer. It is concise and gets the point across but perhaps a bit more specificity? Where you were stationed, what age you went into the army? These are just suggestions but it reads a bit short to me. However what you have is good. On ...

I think the fact that 3 Moons end up involved in the same case through 3 separate reasons stretches credulity. Jake the killer, Frank the reporter sent evidence, Ethan the detective assigned to the case. I think you would have a hard time making that believable. However, if you can devise a reason W...

Okay, I let this stew for a week, and after looking it over, I've made some minor changes. Any new thoughts? Dear Agent, Sixteen year-old Sixteen-year-old Chris Drake and his best friend, Yvonne, are dragon slayers for the? Denver branch of the Fraternity of Wyrm Fiends. Days after their first kill...

Hello! My query is here if you'd like to take a look. This is about the first two pages. Let me know what you think! Any and all suggestions are appreciated. Thanks in advance :) We were well well is a weak word in this usage into the Snoqualmie National Forest, tucked into the North Cascades. I th...

I was talking to a friend that is writing a book and he said he didn't have a title yet. I couldn't understand that! I LOVE thinking of titles for my books. I have titles for books I haven't even started writing yet. So... am I odd? Do you like thinking of titles or is it something you do not conce...

Currently reading "The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo"

I know, me and everybody else right? Generally I avoid things that are too hyped, too mainstream but I must admit I find Larsson's novel compelling. I can't put it down!