Nathan Bransford - The Forums

Revised: The Lunar King bargained his daughter away in marriage to end generations of war between the two dynasties of the Skyfall Isles. The King sends his niece Chandi along as handmaid to his daughter. Chandi has two tasks: watch over her cousin, and spy on the Solars. Still seething over the de...

Watcher it sounds good. I think in writing numbers less than one hundred it is customary to spell out the number, e.g. "seventeen-year-old." Isn't it considered risky to compare your work to that of famous authors like J.K. Rowling? Good luck, your project sounds great. Actually I think i...

Ishta wrote:Just saw your new location, Watcher: "Plantser-ville"! LOL! I love it!

Thanks, I wish I could remember where I picked it up...

OK, here's the first final draft. The only major change is the last paragraph. Dear Mr./Ms Agent, Ted, like any other intelligent 17-year-old 21st Century boy, should know things – like his name and his past. The gods whose origins lie in an alternate future, enslave Ted, and wipe his memory in thei...

MattLarkin wrote:Thanks for all the help everybody! I'll work on this some more in a bit.

seniyajw wrote:I will definitely take to work through the tightening of the shoots! It 'so nice and refreshing to get different perspectives.

What?

spam spam spam spam -- spammity spam --

I'm not sure surprise has any one color, except in France where apparently surprise is "shocking blue." Unless there's a French-from-France expression I don't know, I think that's more fear. Also, what do you do when someone tells you "colour me surprised" ? With what colour ? C...

I'm not sure surprise has any one color, except in France where apparently surprise is "shocking blue."

This is just a drive-by post, but I was getting ready to do some pruning and weeding and I started humming this:


Don't forget Johnny the drag-racer from the fifties - or Johnny appleseed for that matter.

Ok, this is freaky. Have you been going through my legal pads? Whether it's a fetus in a womb, a bubble in a beer, or an apple in a bowl, the M-brane is one of eleven space-time dimensions. It's where our Universe interfaces with the next. If you've never read FLATLAND , I recommend that you do. You...

For generations the Solar and Lunar Dynasties fought for control of the Skyfall Archipelago. When the war ends, the lunar Chandi is sent to watch over her cousin the new bride of the solar emperor. But the lunar king gives her another task: spy on the solars and find a way to overthrow their empire...

Shoot, even cosmologists and theoretical physicists can't agree on what the M in M-theory stands for. If you're looking for insight from a scientist with an imagination - Brian Greene THE ELEGANT UNIVERSE THE FABRIC OF THE COSMOS THE HIDDEN REALITY He even wrote a sci-fi story - ICARUS AT THE EDGE O...

I appreciate that Ted is at the whim of gods and mortals who use him as a plaything for their own ends. If he's the protagonist though, at some point early on he should be the most proactive in addressing the main dramatic complication, what his personal goal is as it emerges from a wtf moment to u...

Dear Mr./Ms Agent, Ted, like any other intelligent 17-year-old 21st Century boy, should know things – like his name and his past. The gods’ origins lie in an alternate future. There's no transition from Ted to gods here. It makes the description feel jarring. It made more sense in your previous dra...

Thanks to the birth of the processed food industry in the 1950's, for the first time in history, it's easier to be fat than thin. Everybody wants to be with successful people, and for most of our history, the most successful people were the ones with extra money for food, and so were more likely to...

I can't tell y'all how much I appreciate your generosity, and I'm starting to feel confident about this whole thing. I did some more tweaking, but then I want to respond to one of Polymath's suggestions because it might have something to do with the difficulties I'm having. Dear Mr./Ms Agent, Ted, l...