Etiquette applies in the publishing world, too.

[etiquettebitch]

Hello, most fabulous writer. You finished your novel/memoir/whatever. Congratulations. And your book is just so spectacular, you just know it's gonna set the world on fire. I'm sure it is. But before you go pissing off most of the publishing world (thus preventing your book from being published), let's practice some basic business etiquette. Some common sense and courtesy will go a long way.
Three "Must-Dos" (or "don'ts") before you approach an agent:

• Follow -- to the letter -- the agency's submission guidelines. This is the number one "duh" rule, but I must say this, knowing how many agents get unsolicited calls daily. If you wanted a job at, oh, let's say Microsoft, you wouldn't call the HR Director and pester her on her lunchtime to list all your fabulous qualities, right? (Well, you might if you're a rude jerk.) No, you'd scour their website and follow their job application guidelines. Works the same way with an agent. Follow the guidelines posted on their website -- email query, hard copy, whatever. You're not going to win any points by trying to break the system with your virtual version of, "Ooh! Ooh! Mr. Kotter, Mr. Kotter! Read my novel! Now!"
• Take an agent at his/her word, and don't push back. No means no. If an agent tells you, "This isn't the book for me," or "I don't represent [your genre]," say "thank you" and move on. Don't shoot back with, "Why not?" or, "If you'll just ..." or, "Well who will represent [my genre]?" In the business world, we're taught to get ahead by pressing on; don't do this with an agent. Use the myriad resources out there (GLA, for example) to research another avenue.
• Respect that agents are agents, not freelance (emphasis on "free") editors. Please don't hit up an agent for an editorial appraisal. "Could you just read my novel and tell me which characters don't stand out?" or "Tell me where it needs flushing out?" or any variation of these requests will turn off an agent. They don't have time to read material they're not representing, and it's not their job. Freelance editors are all over the place -- find one, polish up your book, and then get submitting.

Publishing, for as huge as it is, is also a small world. Agents know each other. They talk to each other. You want them, one day, to say something like, "I got this cool submission from Mary Smith," not, "Mary Smith? Damn, that name rings a bell. Oh yeah -- she wouldn't stop calling me last May when I was at a conference." Make your work shine -- not your bad manners.