What Writing Fiction & Adoption Have in Common

[annieb25]

Early last week I decided to write my first ever short story and enter it in a competition. I thought I would be rather clever and be able to write fiction and blog at the same time ... I was wrong. I also thought, because I can sit here blogging and comfortably belt out 500 plus words in ten minutes that I'd be ace at writing fiction. I was also wrong.

I haven't written fiction since school, it has almost always been journal writing, plus the odd poem. By odd I mean really odd. Trippy, sort of. But that's a story for another day.

So ... last week I decided to write a story, a short story. I sat at my computer with no plan and no idea where to start. That's usually ok, because when I blog I generally start out that way and the words just come tumbling out. One thing I have learned this week is that I finally get that whole blank page, writers block thing. It never used to make sense to me. It now does and I apologise to the literary world for my ignorance. I closed down my word document and decided that I really need to think about my storyline. Words don't just jump out of your head and onto a page and turn into fiction. Well what do you know?

Throughout my life, even back at school, I have been told I should write. Now that I'm blogging I am told more often I should write. I should write a novel they say. I should do something with my writing. I want to. I would love nothing more than to have a paid writing job. Actually yes, there is one thing I would love more, and that is to write a novel. It wasn't until last week that I began to ask myself the question "can I really write the novel that is supposedly lurking inside me?".

Writing this short story scared me a little (ok a lot). I wrote a draft and thought it was reasonable. I reread it and thought "hmmm, maybe not". I reworked it and reworked it. I sent it to a couple of people I respect immensely and felt ill. I also sent it to my best friend in Germany who read it and emailed me back saying

"Hi, hope this works, please just take this as purely as suggestions or how it would read better from a reader point of view, I love it especially when i re-read it and took more time. When does it have to be submitted?"

This was encouraging. I know she won't beat around the bush with her feedback. I can rely on her to very clearly tell me if I am wasting my time. I'm glad she didn't. I then had renewed enthusiasm to edit again and again and have since sent it off for more critiquing.

I am so glad that I made the decision to enter because it has given me a realistic expectation of how hard it is to write a work of fiction. These are the three main things I've learnt in the space of a week:

1. Writing is a craft. An artform. You don't just drop words on a page and your story is written. Writing is like a sculpture, you start off with a rudimentary block of words and then you keep crafting them and crafting them. You sculpt away unnecessary words and turn ordinary words into beautiful prose.

2. Writing requires infinite patience. You have to be prepared to revisit and rewrite and edit and re edit. It is true when they say your first draft is simply that ... a draft. No one ever writes a first draft they are happy to have published. Embarrassingly I thought that was rubbish - I was sure my first draft would be great. I feel rather silly at my arrogance.

3. Writing a book is like having a baby and putting it up for adoption. While you are creating it, you become the book you write. You become the characters. You live them. You breathe them, but ultimately you don't own them. You have to hand them over to someone else who will be responsible to turn your manuscript into a real book. Then your book belongs to your readers. Writing is a huge lesson in letting go.

I still have so much to learn, but those 3 things were really key for me this week. Yes, it is definitely going to be much harder than I first thought and that's ok. I am a big believer in the saying "if something is too easy to come by, it's probably not worth having in the first place".

Annie
Blogger, Writer, Researcher and lover of life.