Nathan Bransford - The Forums

I know this is an older thread, but I compulsively comment on this topic.

I hate overuse of said bookisms. I notice them when I read. I get annoyed that they're breaking the guided meditation that is reading. I will let a whisper or a mutter pass, provided they are fairly rare. I have thrown books over expounding, hissing, laughing, and smiling dialogue. I read genre books for story, character, tension, etc. I don't want literary gymnastics. I don't want the writer coming out from behind the curtain to wink at me over how cool the special effects are. Wasn't that a nice turn of phrase? Nudge, nudge. Did you grasp the nuance of meaning there? I want to scream, "Get out of my reading, author! You're blocking traffic!"

Yes, I know I'm getting hysterical. :) I'm with Ink and LGS. Use the adverbs and whispers sparingly, in comparison to the saids and the tagless dialogue, and the book won't meet wallpaper. Yes, I know tons of published authors have them, which is fine provided you're a bestselling author already. One might also check the publication dates on some of them. The rules are different for blockbuster authors, and rules for the rest of us change over time.

(Yes, I throw bestsellers with bookisms too.)

No offense to bookism fans. Just my two-cents, plus interest.

-confessions of an unabashed book-chucker.

I use very few dialogue tags. As for the OP's example, there are plenty of ways to write it to convey emotion without a tag at all depending on the context.

The funny thing is, I had my book up for crit somewhere, and a few people took the 'no dialogue tags' to the extreme. They'd find the ONE tag I had, which was 'said' and try to tell me that I didn't need the tag. Sure, maybe it wasn't necessariy, but there are times where I don't want to go identify the speaker by an action before or after, I want to get to the dialogue so I don't slow down the scene, yet I want it clear who is speaking without then having to say the name of the other character a dozen times, which is way worse.

In my WIP, I actually worried when I had my character whisper, thinking, 'Oh no! The dreaded tag!" but, in the scene, there were possible bad guys in the other room and the character had to whisper so as not to be heard by the bad guys. Would have been stupid to not mention that and have the reader think he spoke in a normal tone of voice, and would have slowed down the scene to do the whole "he spoke in a low voice".

I don't consider "said" to be a tag. Said is neutral. Even Mr Stingy Elmore Leonard approves of "said." He just says never use any other tag besides said. That said, I think it is okay to sprinkle in a few others here and there as needed. Sometimes it is simpler to put one in rather than go through the rigmarole of writing so that it isn't needed. Simpler is better for both the reader and the writer. Just about every book has them, so I don't see a problem. Same with adjectives and adverbs. Sure it is best to avoid them, but sometimes they are the most expedient way to proceed with the story.

"said" is invisible. Most readers see it, but don't register its presence. I usually don't use alternative dialogue tags unless there's something I can convey by it (ie. "lied") Anything longer than 1 syllable is too much.

I don't use tags that aren't "said" or "asked" very often. Sometimes, but I'm careful. And here's why: Pick up a book, any book, and start reading. Most people gloss over the dialogue tag unless they aren't sure who is talking, and even then it's just to pick out a name or a gender identifier. Most people don't really read every single word on a page, or a see every single letter in a word, we fill in from experience which helps us go faster and absorb more in a shorter amount of time. Dialogue tags fall into this, are swallowed up entirely by all the BETTER stuff going on around it. Like the dialogue itself and the action. I find that the over use of different dialogue tags actually distracts me while I'm reading, but that is just me.

That being said, they aren't evil. They have their place. There are plenty of moments where I know that the whisper, pant, gasp, scream, sob, choke or whatever gave me context, especially when the character was acting outside a predictable reaction. Use them well and they'll work for you, overuse them and I think the writing gets weaker.

On a personal note, I have a writing quirk in my first draft where I will overuse dialogue tags that aren't "said" and when I do I tend to use more "ly" words to modify the special tag. Because why "whisper" when you can "whisper softly?" Ouch. So if I cut out the special tags I cut out the unnecessary adverbs too.