Does anyone know some good jokes about writers, agents, or english? I have two that I like.
A writer is taking a tour of hell. The imp tourguide is leading the group from room to room, showing them the different job specific areas they have set up. "Where do you keep the writers?" The writer asked.
"Right in here," The imp said, leading them to a room. Inside were hundreds of writers sitting hunched over burning keyboards. Imps walked through the aisles, brandishing their whips and shouting about deadlines.
"Ugh, I definately don't want to end up here," The writer said. The next day he was on a tour of heaven. He asked the angel where the writers went, and the angel led him to a room. Inside were hundreds of writers sitting hunched over burning keyboards. Imps walked through the aisles, brandishing their whips and shouting about deadlines. "This is just like hell!"
"Not really," the angel said. "These guys get published."
An english teacher was talking to his class about negative words, "It's just like algebra. A positive and a negative make a negative. Two negatives make a positive. Never will two positives make a negative." One student called from the back of the class, "Yeah right!"
Favorite writing jokes
-
- Posts: 82
- Joined: May 21st, 2010, 10:10 pm
- Contact:
Re: Favorite writing jokes
Those are great! Now I'm scouring my brain for jokes like that.
*smoke begins pouring from ears*
I think I'll have to get back to you...
*smoke begins pouring from ears*
I think I'll have to get back to you...
Brenda :)
Inspiration isn't about the muse. Inspiration is working until something clicks. ~Brandon Sanderson
Inspiration isn't about the muse. Inspiration is working until something clicks. ~Brandon Sanderson
Re: Favorite writing jokes
Writer who is a mushroom comes into a bar, says give me a whiskey. Or bourbon. Bartender says, "Doesn't matter. We don't serve writers here." Writer says, "Why not? I'm a fungi."
Writer who is a horse comes into a bar, bartender says, "Why the long face -- wait, don't tell me, another form-rejection?"
Writer who is a moose comes into a bookstore, starts nibbling on books, a page here, a page there. Clerk rushes over, says, "Excuuuuse me, can I help you!?" Writer says, "I'm just browsing."
Writer who is a horse comes into a bar, bartender says, "Why the long face -- wait, don't tell me, another form-rejection?"
Writer who is a moose comes into a bookstore, starts nibbling on books, a page here, a page there. Clerk rushes over, says, "Excuuuuse me, can I help you!?" Writer says, "I'm just browsing."
Re: Favorite writing jokes
Did you hear the one about the pregnant woman who went into labor and began to yell, "Couldn't! Wouldn't! Shouldn't! Didn't! Can't!"? She was having contractions.
Re: Favorite writing jokes
My apologies to blondes (I'm an ash myself).
So did you hear about how dumb that new blond actress is?
No, how dumb?
She f***ed the writer.
(We need someplace for director jokes, though, because my best joke is about James Cameron. Stolen, of course; I am a writer.)
So did you hear about how dumb that new blond actress is?
No, how dumb?
She f***ed the writer.
(We need someplace for director jokes, though, because my best joke is about James Cameron. Stolen, of course; I am a writer.)
Urban fantasy, epic fantasy, and hot Norse elves. http://margolerwill.blogspot.com/
Re: Favorite writing jokes
I admit I googled it. Thought it was funny:
Ode to the Spell Check
Eye halve a spelling chequer
It cam with my pea sea
It plainly marques four my revue
Miss steaks eye kin knot sea.
Eye strike a key and type a word
And weight four it two say
Weather eye am wrong oar write
It shows me strait a weigh.
As soon as a mist ache is maid
It nose bee fore two long
And eye can put the error rite
Its rare lea ever wrong.
Eye have run this poem threw it
I am shore your pleased two no
Its letter perfect awl the weigh
My chequer tolled me sew!
Ode to the Spell Check
Eye halve a spelling chequer
It cam with my pea sea
It plainly marques four my revue
Miss steaks eye kin knot sea.
Eye strike a key and type a word
And weight four it two say
Weather eye am wrong oar write
It shows me strait a weigh.
As soon as a mist ache is maid
It nose bee fore two long
And eye can put the error rite
Its rare lea ever wrong.
Eye have run this poem threw it
I am shore your pleased two no
Its letter perfect awl the weigh
My chequer tolled me sew!
My blog: http://mirascorner.blogspot.com/
Who is online
Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 23 guests