I'd suggest taking a closer look at the cast and their roles. A main character is one who's central to the dramatic action, but essentially unchanged by the circumstances. A protagonist is the most proactive character who's not necessarily central but experiences the most change. An antagonist isn't necessarily a villain or a nemesis. An antagonist compels change of the protagonist, and is, in turn, also changed.
In the scenario you've painted, washingtonwriter1968, I see the main character as the reader surrogate and attitude holder. The persona who readers are intended to most identify with, which for the sake of fully satisfying endings means the persona who is most changed by the circumstances. Then the inciting incident is a matter of first impressions gone awry. Since the change or transformation seems to be intended for the main character's perceptions of the protagonist, I see them rolled into one persona, or the main character as a deuteragonist, or vice versa, the protagonist actually the deuteragonist, and the main character the protagonist.
In other words, an ending is a consequence, usually inevitable, of a beginning. Seems to me the underlying message as related to theme is, You can't judge a book by its cover. So the beginning's inciting incident is a matter of mistaken perceptions caused by self-serving, self-gratifying, self-absorbed attitudes. And the dramatic action is resistance to self-sacrificing, compromising attitudes. The action then might unfold as every complicating force pressing in to change that resistance to acceptance. Then the dramatic conflict is resistance contending against acceptance. Theme's unifying power and organizing principle then might be based on that dramatic conflict.
Relevant literary theme's from San José State University website;
http://www.sjsu.edu/faculty/patten/theme.html
2. The Individual in Society
a. Society and a person's inner nature are always at war.
b. Social influences determine a person's final destiny.
c. Social influences can only complete inclinations formed by Nature.
d. A person's identity is determined by place in society.
e. In spite of the pressure to be among people, an individual is essentially alone and frightened.
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