Kolin Grey and the Misty Moors Academy

Ugh. You got stuck writing a synopsis. Help is on the way.
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brownwr
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Kolin Grey and the Misty Moors Academy

Post by brownwr » May 24th, 2022, 12:38 pm

Hello,
I have gotten some good feedback on my query in the queries feedback. I even got one agent to request more but got rejected.
Here is the synopses I sent with the query. Please provide some feedback if you get time. I have thick skin from all the rejections so let it fly :)

Thanks in advance.


John and Donna Grey planned a vacation to Paris for twins Kolin and Kaira's birthday. Around age twelve, certain things manifest in the Grey and Wyard family lines.

Donna and John realized this moment would come but were not ready for it and were hoping to avoid the unavoidable. For the twins' sake, they left the world of magic behind, knowing that it is dangerous in the wrong hands, and they did not want it in their children's hands.

The day before the family's vacation, they receive an unexpected visit from a former Professor Blanche Fitton, and an old colleague of their parent's in their store in London, turning their world upside down.

The Professor Informs them that their family's fate and countless others were at stake. Left with little choice, they returned to the town of Greymorr. The change in plans did not sit well with Kolin and Kaira to miss the trip of a lifetime. The thought of trading Paris for an old castle and a Grandmother they had never met was not fair. Nevertheless, John and Donna were determined to deliver a book with runic writing sought after for centuries to a man named Sebastian York.

John and Donna meet up with York in Greymorr at the Railway Inn, which leads to their deaths at the hands of the Order of Night. A group that practices dark wizardry will stop at nothing to retrieve the book, but the book is fake.

The actual book ends up with Kolin and Kaira.

Sebastian York is on the run, blamed for John and Donna's murders, for he is a former member of the Order of Night.
With John and Donna dead, a day after arriving in Greymorr. Kolin and Kaira now live with their Grandmother, Eleanor Grey, a virtual stranger and a stickler for proper manors. She is cold to the children at first since John and Donna left before they were born and had not returned until now.

Eleanor is faced with raising two preteens in a world they know nothing about while convincing them to attend the Misty Moors Academy. The same school their parents attended and taught.

She enlists help from her old friend, whom she blames for supporting John and Donna for leaving, and the Academy's Chancellor Godfrey Frost.

As he likes to go by, Professor Godfrey helps Kolin and Kaira gain admittance and catch up with their studies, for they are one year behind their classmates. Students usually start the Misty Moors Academy at the age of Eleven.

Friends were never Kolin and Kaira's strong suit, and they could not relate to their classmates in the city. But, as it turns out, Kolin and Kaira meet two new friends whom they can relate to in Avery Stansberry and Walter Thornton, the night their parents are killed.

Avery is sharp and talented; on the other hand, Walter is easygoing and does not get caught up in who's the better at magic but is quite good in his own right. Both of their families are from a long line of witches and wizards. Kolin and Kaira need all the help they can get from Avery and Walter to adjust to this new World of Wizardry.

Finding their way to class is a challenge for the inside of the academy reminds them of a relativity painting.

Kolin and Kaira also cross paths with a wand collecting bully named Edmund Brystowe and his cohorts.

Kolin and Kaira cannot sit idly by and start unraveling the trail that leads to their parent's killers and the reason for their deaths with help from their friends.

Along the way, Kolin finds a man named Nicholas Harbottle living on the academy's roof with long-term memory loss from a mysterious battle that happened at the academy. Along with run-ins with the Headless Horseman, Stormie, a forest sprite, and a Leprechaun named Larkin.

Bit by bit Kolin and Kaira learn more about their parent's past and the Order of Nights' quest for the book, The Origin, and History of Avalon Crystals. The key to finding six crystals made by the Wizard Merlin with the power to take over the world.

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