Query: Heaven - Rev. 1
Posted: August 19th, 2010, 10:25 am
I've been urged to post a query for one of my novels here numerous times, but I've always resisted - just that stupid pride that I could do it myself I guess. The truth is that I need some serious help with my query writing skills. Various revisions of the query below have been sent to around 40 agents, and I've piled up around 30 rejections and 1 partial. Needless to say, those are not enviable statistics!!
Anyway, here it is:
Dear Agent,
I am seeking representation for my science fiction novel of approximately 100,000 words, titled Heaven. I thought that you might be a good agent for this project based on (whatever).
Early in the 22nd century, Earth has been destroyed by the Alien Hordes, and humankind stands on the brink of extinction. Those that remain reside in Heaven, a city protected from all wavelengths of radiation by an advanced amalgamation of Metamaterials and Hyperlenses. When an accident occurs that leaves Heaven exposed, however, Jon Roland, Lord Prime of the Last Resistance, becomes fearful that humankind will soon meet its end.
Throwing off all loyalties and defying every law that makes Heaven what it is, Jon moves to inspect the biotechnological creations that have been built up over centuries to defend Heaven from attack. As expected, the alien assault comes quickly, and the awe-inspiring defenders crush the breach, pressing the aliens back beyond Jon's wildest expectations.
But the attack has other consequences as well, ones that Jon can't begin to imagine. Deep within Heaven, insinuating seeds of treachery are suddenly loosed, and more alien attacks rain down on the city and the people inside. Tirelessly, Jon continues to investigate, throwing aside love and nearly his life before he realizes what the attacks really are and who is instigating them. Digging deeper, he becomes trapped in a game of deep-seated lies with a powerful member of the Resistance named Marcus Slade, one that extends as far back as Heaven itself. The city isn't really what it seems, he discovers, and neither are the people or the aliens. Before the city can be crushed by the Volkrons, the most powerful aliens that exist, Jon realizes that he must use the truth to destroy Slade and stop the attack, or lose Heaven and those that he loves forever.
A full, completed manuscript of the novel is available upon request. If you are interested in reading it, please don't hesitate to contact me at the number, address, or e-mail below.
Thank you very much for your time and consideration of this query. I genuinely appreciate it.
Anyway, here it is:
Dear Agent,
I am seeking representation for my science fiction novel of approximately 100,000 words, titled Heaven. I thought that you might be a good agent for this project based on (whatever).
Early in the 22nd century, Earth has been destroyed by the Alien Hordes, and humankind stands on the brink of extinction. Those that remain reside in Heaven, a city protected from all wavelengths of radiation by an advanced amalgamation of Metamaterials and Hyperlenses. When an accident occurs that leaves Heaven exposed, however, Jon Roland, Lord Prime of the Last Resistance, becomes fearful that humankind will soon meet its end.
Throwing off all loyalties and defying every law that makes Heaven what it is, Jon moves to inspect the biotechnological creations that have been built up over centuries to defend Heaven from attack. As expected, the alien assault comes quickly, and the awe-inspiring defenders crush the breach, pressing the aliens back beyond Jon's wildest expectations.
But the attack has other consequences as well, ones that Jon can't begin to imagine. Deep within Heaven, insinuating seeds of treachery are suddenly loosed, and more alien attacks rain down on the city and the people inside. Tirelessly, Jon continues to investigate, throwing aside love and nearly his life before he realizes what the attacks really are and who is instigating them. Digging deeper, he becomes trapped in a game of deep-seated lies with a powerful member of the Resistance named Marcus Slade, one that extends as far back as Heaven itself. The city isn't really what it seems, he discovers, and neither are the people or the aliens. Before the city can be crushed by the Volkrons, the most powerful aliens that exist, Jon realizes that he must use the truth to destroy Slade and stop the attack, or lose Heaven and those that he loves forever.
A full, completed manuscript of the novel is available upon request. If you are interested in reading it, please don't hesitate to contact me at the number, address, or e-mail below.
Thank you very much for your time and consideration of this query. I genuinely appreciate it.