Query: Use Somebody *Updated*

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OneChoice1
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Re: Query: Use Somebody *Updated*

Post by OneChoice1 » July 13th, 2010, 6:43 pm

Any critiquers?
Jesus loves.

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OneChoice1
Posts: 53
Joined: January 5th, 2010, 2:05 am
Contact:

Re: Query: Use Somebody *Updated*

Post by OneChoice1 » July 14th, 2010, 9:48 pm

#11


Dear [Agent’s name]:

Rashel McSwain’s always running in England--from her abusive father, bullets, and now prison. Poisoning judges for a million dollars was a success; fleeing away to get her hands on the money...not so much. Rashel’s conviction isn’t determined in court, though. Officials work under the table to toss the sixteen-year-old in a cell and digest the key.

The first year in prison is paradise. When Rashel opts for an experimental microchip to be implanted in her brain, she’s sure she will miss the charming guards who mistake her for a punching bag; rejuvenating showers that imitate knives; and mind-boggling meals that glue her end to a toilet. Not being able to physically harm another person without suffering excruciating pain herself doesn’t seem bad at all. She may have committed murder, but she’s not an aggressive person. To keep her freedom, Rashel must embark on a thirteen-month trial period and experience culture shock in a remote Washington town.

A narrow escape from an errant skateboard introduces her to Alan Pierce. The little tolerance she has for him is further repressed when this selfless daredevil wants to show her why he worships Jesus Christ. Rashel has no desire to hear about Calvary or resurrections, but Alan’s persistent. Instead of welcoming in Jesus, Rashel finds herself looking forward to her encounters with Alan.

Rashel’s disgusted. She avoids Alan to exterminate this crush. All’s well until she loses her temper and hits a floozy who has the hots for Alan. The distress from her microchip causes a seizure and knocks her unconscious, leaving others to assume she has epilepsy. Rashel wakes up to Alan praying for her, and his tears help her decide he’s worth taking a chance on. But Alan’s more interested in showing her the way of Christ, and even worse, his eyes are fixed on another. Falling in love seems to be trickier than actually getting away with murder.

Now Rashel’s set on winning Alan’s heart before she’s pulled out of Washington. If that means cracking open the Bible and getting to know this Jesus Christ fella, then so be it. Never did it cross her mind that getting deeper into God’s word would make her struggle with who she is and who she could be. Rashel thought she was strong enough to face anything, but the light…it burns.

RUNNING FROM THE LIGHT is an inspirational romance of blah blah blah words. Thank you for your time and consideration. I look forward to hearing from you.

Regards,
Jesus loves.

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