YA coming-of-age romance query critique

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StarfishLouise
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Joined: June 17th, 2021, 8:03 pm
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YA coming-of-age romance query critique

Post by StarfishLouise » June 17th, 2021, 8:14 pm

I'm looking for critiques and constructive criticism/ideas on my query.


Dear Agent x,


What would we risk being uncomfortable for? This is the question Sawyer Delvi has been desperately trying to solve since his father's death caused a ripple in his life. To what lengths would we go to avoid the different and uncomfortable situations? Though Sawyer has moved past his father's death, he is still cautious around the fracture it’s caused within every aspect of his family life, and isn’t sure of much anymore as he comes to a fork in the path with his life: choose the same fate as his sister, or deal with the arranged marriage handing over his head like an axe and become king through being the wrong heir to the throne.

Can impossible dreams come true? Asked everyone with ambition ever. Gemma Prescott never was one to shy away from a challenge especially when it challenges the social norms set aside for what women should and shouldn’t do. But as the divide between Gemma and her mother only continues to grow she begins to question her dreams and the society she lives in, causing self-doubt to settle inside. Being the daughter of a split family with clashing opinions, different cultures, and personal grieving processes never seemed easy. But it was also never hard until Gemma watches the life of her dreams start to play out in her favor after receiving a high-end job at the palace, only a few lies would have to be told to keep her life on the right track, her relationship with her family can’t get worse if she just keeps them under wraps for the time being. Well, hopefully.

After meeting Gemma and Sawyer click instantly, nearly too instantly. Deciphering and deciding to act upon unacceptable feelings was always a stretch, especially for a prince and a commoner; especially when he’s betrothed to her childhood best friend. But love always wins, right? Arguments, kingdom politics, and social dilemmas get in their way so when they have one chance for the perfect night together they aren’t throwing away their shot even if it means breaking every rule in the book. But can they be each other’s forever or will they be just a glimpse of life for each other?

I am seeking representation on my novel, [Title] is a young adult coming-of-age romance of 100,000 words filled with first love, fate, and hate that would appeal and be an enjoyable read for fans of the princess and the pauper as well as la-la land. Having a character-driven plot my manuscript is similar to Again But Better, and explores different areas including mixed families, tackling gender stereotypes/inequalities, as well as it battles social issues similar to the ones we face in society today.

Thank you for critiquing my query letter!

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