Search found 104 matches
- March 26th, 2011, 12:27 pm
- Forum: Queries
- Topic: The Horror of Hayesfield- YA HORROR
- Replies: 7
- Views: 2754
Re: The Horror of Hayesfield- YA HORROR
When Adam travels to Hayesfield to live with his grandparents, he feels as if his luck couldn't get much worse. Now, in addition to struggling with the suicide of his best (and only) friend, he has been exiled to the drafty Harlow Manor in the middle of Nowhere, Ohio, where the kids are mean to the...
- March 26th, 2011, 12:23 pm
- Forum: Queries
- Topic: Query - The Beautiful People
- Replies: 20
- Views: 7249
Re: Query - The Beautiful People
[quote="bronwyn1"] Seventeen-year-old Magdalena’s best friends have long-time wealth and prestige, but she has something better: their secrets. Old money and a fancy surname can’t mask all their problems. I would cut this last sentence, you started really well, but the sentence destroys al...
- January 22nd, 2011, 11:03 am
- Forum: Queries
- Topic: NIGHTFRAME: IN THE RED OF THE KNIGHT Query II
- Replies: 17
- Views: 6615
Re: NIGHTFRAME: IN THE RED OF THE KNIGHT Query II
I really liked this version Mary! I agree that you should let us know what Tabitha wants (recognition in the werewolf community etc) but asides that, this is quite interesting, since I love dark, evil romantic interests as well! lol Im hoping everything works out with your publishing friend! Crossin...
- January 22nd, 2011, 10:54 am
- Forum: Queries
- Topic: Query: Jade's Hurricane back from rejection
- Replies: 12
- Views: 4712
Re: Query: Jade's Hurricane back from rejection
Very good points glj!!! Thanks a LOT for that! I tried to fix them and posted the new version under revised 2. I couldnt add more of the details you were asking for, because then it would just deviate the query from its objective (which isnt the tragedy that happened to Jade when she was a child). T...
- January 22nd, 2011, 10:52 am
- Forum: Queries
- Topic: Query: WIL DRAKE AND THE WITCHES OF THE WATER
- Replies: 8
- Views: 3178
Re: Query: WIL DRAKE AND THE WITCHES OF THE WATER
Yes, don't requery the same agent. Query other agents of the same agency, but not the same. All right, on to your query! Wil Drake, a discharged U.S. Air Service pilot, has survived the last eight years of the 1920s as a booze smuggler in the American South. It’s a lonely existence, but he likes it ...
- January 22nd, 2011, 10:42 am
- Forum: Queries
- Topic: Query up for critique
- Replies: 4
- Views: 2131
Re: Query up for critique
A boy Id say the name of the boy here. Or just a "strange boy" then. pulls Sydney off a cliff and she knows they are both dead. But she can’t resist the urge to attack her murderer. And by then, they are already dead. They are still falling from the cliff? How high was this thing?Id change...
- January 22nd, 2011, 10:37 am
- Forum: Queries
- Topic: Query: The Guardian's Code
- Replies: 14
- Views: 5260
Re: Query: The Guardian's Code
Fifteen-year old Griffin Tutela doesn’t believe the stories his grandma tells him about the forest behind her (I'd write their house, I was confused with 'his' and 'her' here) house. He rolls his eyes when she says his family can communicate with ancient trees and spirits, and that they are Guardian...
- January 20th, 2011, 3:14 am
- Forum: Queries
- Topic: Query: Jade's Hurricane back from rejection
- Replies: 12
- Views: 4712
Re: Query: Jade's Hurricane back from rejection
That was a fantastic feedback, thank you so much Mary!
Yes, we're down the painful road of querying, but at least we're not alone = )
One day, definitely. One day...
Yes, we're down the painful road of querying, but at least we're not alone = )
One day, definitely. One day...
- January 19th, 2011, 10:13 am
- Forum: Queries
- Topic: Query: Jade's Hurricane back from rejection
- Replies: 12
- Views: 4712
Re: Query: Jade's Hurricane back from rejection
Hey everyone, thanks for all the help! Very insightful tips!
Could you let me know if the revised Query is better?
Thank you!
Could you let me know if the revised Query is better?
Thank you!
- January 19th, 2011, 9:46 am
- Forum: Queries
- Topic: Query: Sacred Fire, historical fiction
- Replies: 8
- Views: 3115
Re: Query: Sacred Fire, historical fiction
Tuccia awaits trial knowing she will be executed for a crime she did not commit: losing her virginity. For other Roman women, this would not be an offense, but for a priestess of Vesta, such a sin could displease the gods and condemn Rome to ruin. Tuccia’s accuser is an angry priest who failed to se...
- January 19th, 2011, 9:44 am
- Forum: Queries
- Topic: REVISED Query: COZY'S CURSE (mystery)
- Replies: 14
- Views: 4901
Re: REVISED Query: COZY'S CURSE (mystery)
I love it. It has everything: voice, a good plot, interesting characters. Bravo!
- January 19th, 2011, 9:42 am
- Forum: Queries
- Topic: NEVER REMEMBER: YA Fantasy Revised
- Replies: 15
- Views: 5629
Re: NEVER REMEMBER: YA Fantasy Revised
One thing: How can she be dead and go through all this? Is she a ghost? I would clarify that a bit more.
Everything else seems pretty cool =) Good luck!
Everything else seems pretty cool =) Good luck!
- January 19th, 2011, 9:38 am
- Forum: Queries
- Topic: NIGHTFRAME: IN THE RED OF THE KNIGHT Query
- Replies: 9
- Views: 3423
Re: NIGHTFRAME: IN THE RED OF THE KNIGHT Query
Brody thinks Tabitha is a hero-- but, of course, love is blind. He can't see what she does in the mirror. A monster. I would change that. What can someone do in the mirror besides looking at itself? Maybe: But he can't see who she trully is: A monster. Tabitha knows that one day she won't be able to...
- January 16th, 2011, 6:44 am
- Forum: Queries
- Topic: Query: Jade's Hurricane back from rejection
- Replies: 12
- Views: 4712
Query: Jade's Hurricane back from rejection
Hi Everyone, Is this better? Thanks for all your help! Revised Query 2 Jade’s father used to help her control her wind-taming powers, but when he’s murdered in front of her by humans who can’t master the elements, Jade loses her grip and creates a monstrous hurricane. Six years later, she still stru...
- November 3rd, 2010, 5:27 pm
- Forum: Queries
- Topic: Query: The Soul Baby the Trickster and the Golden Buddha
- Replies: 21
- Views: 8297
Re: Query: The Soul Baby the Trickster and the Golden Buddha
Michael, just comented on your synopsis. I gotta say, the query is brilliant, really liked it. All right, now I'm not sure if you use Kardecism in your book, but if you ever feel like dipping into Brazilian spiritualism, it would be good to check it out just to be sure. Kardecism is really big betwe...