Nathan Bransford - The Forums

Revision Alright, I am going to try this again. Hoping this might explain it a little better. :) Sixteen-year-old Anna is mourning the sudden death of her family. While other maidens her age are preparing to enter into courtships, she is left grasping for answers. Taking refuge in a nearby village ...

I know I've already posted a query but I like writing them and I have a lot of stuff written. Thanks in advance and rip it apart. I can take it :D - Thirteen year old Jin wants to conquer the world. She just needs an army.  I like this opening. Jin was banished from her homeland after finding out t...

I think this draft is better. The only thing I might consider changing would be the use of bedtime in your last sententence. To me, it makes it sound like he is a little kid, but this might just be me. :-P

Cheekychook,

Thanks! I have noticed some agents are specific, while others are not, when it comes to the synopsis. I figured I would ask though, before I start to query those asking for one. Better safe than sorry. :)

So far as prologues being mocked and derided, I know it, it's just plain silly, and it's got to stop. I'm going to have a prologue in every one of my books. Two in some of them. I'm going to start a facebook page, "I Like Prologues, Can't Live Without 'Em." I'm going to call Oprah, Presid...

Quill & Jessa,

Thanks for the input! I wasn't planning on the prologue, but it shows the catalyst to what occurs in chapter one.

I didn't see this already posted and if it is sorry for the repost. When an agent asks for 3 sample chapters does the prologue count as a chapter? Mine is only a page and a half and provides a hook that sets up the first chapter. I have read some people say yes it does count and others say if it is ...

Alex Benson just lost his wife to suicide, but that’s the least of his worries. With his wife's death haunting his thoughts, he finds he can no longer live a normal life and ends up at an Apostolic Pentecostal church. But the gods If you are looking at this from his stand point wouldn't it be God n...

Hi everyone. Here's the query for THE THORN TREE, a 60,000 word YA Supernatural. I haven't bothered with the basic intro/closing parts. Please have at it! I have a thick skin. When Carolyn Lepworth’s parents die in a subway accident she moves in with her estranged grandmother in Rathcrannog, New Ha...

Arbraun thanks for the comments! I agree it is too long but wanted to hear suggestions before starting to cut it down :)

Thanks for the comments whip. This synopsis is my whole story with the ending. It is meant to be told in two parts but written to stand alone as well.

This is my first post here, also the first query I've posted anywhere. And the first one I have ever written so feedback your be amazing! And I'll give you feedback on your query (not sure if I'm totally qualified to, but at least I can tell you is something doesn't make sense right?) Anyways, so h...

I like your synopsis. There were only two things that struck me. 1: "He sends two of his minions to talk the girls into joining him, and as a result, Jade creates a hurricane worse then any before, an uncontrolled Titan who is going to swipe the Air Nation from the face of the earth." Why ...

Clara,

Thanks for the advice.I knew it was running long just wasn't sure what exactly to cut.

Thanks in advance for the advice :) Anna’s sixteenth birthday should have been a time celebrating her transition into adulthood, but instead it marks the brutal murder of her family members. With nowhere else to go, Anna heads into the small village of Litchfield to find family friends, Dermot and T...