Search found 97 matches

by LurkingVirologist
September 6th, 2012, 1:08 am
Forum: Writing
Topic: The Coffee Shop - SEPTEMBER
Replies: 33
Views: 5141

Re: The Coffee Shop - SEPTEMBER

Ok, so I've been feeling sick most of the summer. Not sick like, I have the flu sick, but sick like I just don't feel WELL. I've been sleeping a ton and despite the fact I hit the gym 4-5 days a week and eat healthy, I haven't lost any weight. My concentration has been crappy and I constantly feel ...
by LurkingVirologist
September 6th, 2012, 12:46 am
Forum: Queries
Topic: Newly Revised Query for YA Supernatural -- Updated
Replies: 6
Views: 1470

Re: Newly Revised Query for YA Supernatural

You know the [drill] "Sixteen-year-old Lucas Fuller barely recognizes his face without cuts and bruises. Bullies can smell fear, and he's never had the balls to fight back. When the girl he's madly in love with rejects him to stay with [for] her abusive boyfriend, it's the final blow [can you think...
by LurkingVirologist
September 4th, 2012, 10:40 pm
Forum: Writing
Topic: The Coffee Shop - SEPTEMBER
Replies: 33
Views: 5141

Re: The Coffee Shop - SEPTEMBER

I don't know about anyone else - but there was this magical point when I was grinding through my dissertation and assembling my defense presentation (1-1.5 hour open lecture + closed committee meeting) when I just kinda went.... **** it! If they don't ****ing like it then too *** ***** bad! Strangel...
by LurkingVirologist
September 2nd, 2012, 3:52 pm
Forum: Queries
Topic: NEWEST REVISION - Query - The Phoenix: A Gathering
Replies: 9
Views: 2289

Re: **REVISED** Query - The Phoenix: A Gathering

Pretty good. One quibble - you use some variation of the phrase "human race" or the word "race" at least four times in the last two paragraphs. I think you can change the phrasing slightly to eliminate the repetition without too much trouble.
by LurkingVirologist
September 1st, 2012, 7:41 pm
Forum: Self-Publishing
Topic: Fixing Book Rankings
Replies: 26
Views: 5152

Re: Fixing Book Rankings

it's B&N manipulating their bestseller list. I'm a regular participant on the B&N forums, and I can guess that this is due to the regular pressure on those forums for B&N to "stop peddling smut to our kids." So smut includes erotic romance with no naughty words in the title and a cover tamer than m...
by LurkingVirologist
August 30th, 2012, 2:48 am
Forum: Queries
Topic: Please help with Query. Thanks!
Replies: 2
Views: 972

Re: Please help with Query. Thanks!

At the expense of coming off a bit blunt, I'm not actually sure what your manuscript is about, or what genre(s) it's supposed to fit into. Is this supposed to be an action movie? Thriller? Mystery? Comedy? Serious? Spoof? At any rate, you provide the following information about Scarlet: 1) kidnapped...
by LurkingVirologist
August 29th, 2012, 11:51 pm
Forum: Writing
Topic: red-faced rookie
Replies: 6
Views: 1585

Re: red-faced rookie

Anyway, I'm noticing something that is making me very frustrated (and worried because it brings me to the "oh no, I really am that terrible). I make a lot of cliches and I repeat myself a lot with certain expressions and phrases. Most common so far: - "His face fell" (trying to convey a feeling of ...
by LurkingVirologist
August 29th, 2012, 11:46 pm
Forum: Writing
Topic: What makes a dystopia?
Replies: 13
Views: 2205

Re: What makes a dystopia?

Echoing what Mark said, for me the dystopian tag gets affixed to modern or sci-fi settings where our attempts to make things better (through technology or social engineering) have actually done the opposite. A society in which everyone privately acknowledges that it would have been better if the gen...
by LurkingVirologist
August 29th, 2012, 2:04 am
Forum: Excerpts
Topic: Page 1 of "I am Alone"
Replies: 9
Views: 5503

Re: Page 1 of "I am Alone"

Good start. I think the coldness of the character is appropriate, especially given his chosen method of killing and the patience, calm, and precision required for success. One minor wording quip, which is the use of the word "trigger" twice in one sentence and then again one sentence later. I think ...
by LurkingVirologist
August 29th, 2012, 1:38 am
Forum: Self-Publishing
Topic: Fixing Book Rankings
Replies: 26
Views: 5152

Re: Fixing Book Rankings

Given that the common understanding of "Top 100" is, in fact, the top 100 best-rated or best-selling books, I'd consider manual manipulation of those lists to be blatantly unethical. As for author recourse, I'm unsure, beyond the usual American tradition of "lawsuit!" The bookseller is definitely ha...
by LurkingVirologist
August 23rd, 2012, 12:21 am
Forum: Social Media and Book Promotion
Topic: Social media and self-censorship
Replies: 3
Views: 2732

Re: Social media and self-censorship

I think it comes down to evaluating the strength of one's beliefs and the relative importance of what one is about to say. Lets face it, publicly expressing an opinion has consequences, especially if that opinion covers an area about which other people feel passionately. Thanks to the internet, that...
by LurkingVirologist
August 21st, 2012, 12:23 am
Forum: Connect With a Critique Partner
Topic: Looking for UF/Paranormal fan to trade 1st 50 pgs
Replies: 3
Views: 3734

Looking for UF/Paranormal fan to trade 1st 50 pgs

I'm ramping up to query time, and I'd like to swap the first 50 pages (roughly 15K-16K words) of my MS for critique with somebody who enjoys reading Urban Fantasy and/or Paranormal. I've already had positive feedback from two people on this section, but neither were fans of UF/Paranormal, so I'd rea...
by LurkingVirologist
August 20th, 2012, 11:44 pm
Forum: Excerpts
Topic: Help! YA Historical Fiction--TROOPER
Replies: 3
Views: 3117

Re: Help! YA Historical Fiction--TROOPER

I second Kristie - go with the first one.
by LurkingVirologist
August 20th, 2012, 11:40 pm
Forum: Excerpts
Topic: Literary Fiction - Untitled
Replies: 5
Views: 3664

Re: Literary Fiction - Untitled

Nicely done. I'm not a gambler, but everything was understandable, or close enough that I could approximate without breaking the narrative (which is sometimes even better, since it creates a sense of eavesdropping on an unfamiliar world). I agree about the dialogue, it was fast and loose enough to s...
by LurkingVirologist
August 19th, 2012, 2:47 am
Forum: Queries
Topic: YA Paranormal: KEY OF EDEN
Replies: 2
Views: 996

Re: YA Paranormal: KEY OF EDEN

Red is suggested cut , blue is linked to [ a comment ] "Angels suck! Being the key to Eden SUCKS! Actually, there isn’t much about her life that doesn’t suck! Sucky McSucky is what you can call her. [ Honestly, my first impulse was to smack your MC upside the head for being so petulant - I think I ...