Search found 53 matches

by Tzalaran
December 10th, 2009, 9:17 pm
Forum: Queries
Topic: The Light of Epertase
Replies: 18
Views: 4440

Re: The Light of Epertase

i thought the 'magical event' might be one of those things, and i'm sure it wouldn't be a large hang up. you know the manuscript far better than i do, and will know which suggestions you should listen to, and the ones that you shouldn't. ;) It is just the process of making it as perfect as you can, ...
by Tzalaran
December 10th, 2009, 8:16 pm
Forum: Queries
Topic: The Light of Epertase
Replies: 18
Views: 4440

Re: The Light of Epertase

Looks much better to me. got some great advice in the post above this, and i'll throw in my comments below. As always, take my suggestions with a grain of salt. :) Dear: An unstoppable army prepares to attack the kingdom of Epertase, while Rasi, once the kingdom’s greatest warrior, remains long sinc...
by Tzalaran
December 10th, 2009, 11:48 am
Forum: Queries
Topic: The Light of Epertase
Replies: 18
Views: 4440

Re: The Light of Epertase

Tzalaran, I've cut out the buts, but it was hard for me to do. used as it is above, but is not an issue. But if i were to start all my sentences like this, it would get old quickly. (and like i said earlier, it is a pet peeve of mine so it may not have been overly important in the grand scheme of t...
by Tzalaran
December 10th, 2009, 9:51 am
Forum: Queries
Topic: Revised Query... please help...
Replies: 14
Views: 3525

Re: Query please help...

without seeing the opening and closing paragraphs, it is hard to judge your query. that said, i find the voice of the query to be far too passive. Look to show the actions of your main character instead of telling the agent about them. My gut feeling is that there is much you could trim from the ope...
by Tzalaran
December 10th, 2009, 8:17 am
Forum: Queries
Topic: The Light of Epertase
Replies: 18
Views: 4440

Re: The Light of Epertase

Fantasy seems to be almost impossible to query, if you ask me. Some of the most unique concepts are too elaborate to fit into a short query. Everyone knows what a lion is but how many people know what a ferocious ochrid is? So if some elaborate concept is central to your story, how do you tell abou...
by Tzalaran
December 8th, 2009, 11:05 pm
Forum: Writing
Topic: Outline or Out of the Mist?
Replies: 50
Views: 11858

Re: Outline or Out of the Mist?

i'm a believer in story architecture, but i can't say i outline extensively. i generally set up the main points of the novel: set up, hook, first plot point, midpoint, pinch points, second plot point, and the resolution in mind before i start drafting. Until i have those all in mind and know about w...
by Tzalaran
December 8th, 2009, 10:51 pm
Forum: Books
Topic: Recommended Fantasy Under 150K
Replies: 25
Views: 4430

Re: Recommended Fantasy Under 150K

Jhereg by Steven Brust (turned into the Taltos series, but Jhereg easily stands alone) Sword Dancer by Jennifer Roberson (another stand alone that went series) The Elric books by Moorcock are all short reads as well (from what i recall, haven't read them in 10+ years) Most fantasy novels i've read t...
by Tzalaran
December 8th, 2009, 6:18 pm
Forum: Procrastination
Topic: Foruming and our writing
Replies: 12
Views: 2900

Re: Foruming and our writing

There are plenty of venues that cater to the txt/leetspeek crowd, and i don't think this site will be in their field of vision. as far as the flame wars go, that is usually more to the discretion of the admin of the site. in my forums, i don't allow them and am happy to delete inflammatory posts (th...