Search found 24 matches

by Hyaline
August 23rd, 2010, 7:14 pm
Forum: Queries
Topic: Query: Equinox -- YA romance (take 3)
Replies: 16
Views: 3049

Re: Query: Equinox -- YA romance (take 2)

OK, just to start with--great job revising this! It's much clearer and crisper this time around. I've made some points inline below, for what it's worth. Hope they help! Dear [Agent], For Kenzie Johnson, keeping her mom around just got a lot harder. Kenzie is on a first name basis with her mom. I'm ...
by Hyaline
August 23rd, 2010, 6:59 pm
Forum: Queries
Topic: Query: December--Your Help Needed!
Replies: 9
Views: 1663

Query: December--Your Help Needed!

Hi all--thanks for taking a look! My main problem is that my novel is multi-storyline, multi-POV, and I want that to come across without overwhelming the poor soul reading my query. My biggest problem is that all the characters mentioned below get equal playing time--there is no one main protagonist...
by Hyaline
August 20th, 2010, 11:27 am
Forum: Queries
Topic: Jade's Hurricane, Take 2: Will send to Agents
Replies: 15
Views: 2423

Re: Jade's Hurricane, Take 2

Interesting concept--but I agree with some of the other comments, I found myself a tad confused. I've made points inline that I hope help with seeing how at least one reader missed the point :) Hi guys! So, it's been a while, and I changed my query a lot. I tried to give it more voice. What do you t...
by Hyaline
August 20th, 2010, 11:16 am
Forum: Writing
Topic: Do your research!
Replies: 13
Views: 2231

Re: Do your research!

To be honest, I'm not sure if any of us can be 100% sure of the language used in the past and I don't necessarily mean that when we write in the past we must have the perfect vernacular, but there should be at least a basic knowledge of the rules. For example, when living in victorian England, two ...
by Hyaline
August 18th, 2010, 1:33 pm
Forum: Writing
Topic: Do your research!
Replies: 13
Views: 2231

Re: Do your research!

So, I was reading this novel the other day (I won't mention it) and the story was filled with discrepancies. The story took place in the past, but the language did not match what it would have been at that time, and several historical details were horribly mistaken. I definitely hear you--I write h...
by Hyaline
August 18th, 2010, 1:22 pm
Forum: Queries
Topic: FAIRY BLOOD - Fresh out of the oven!
Replies: 7
Views: 1624

Re: FAIRY BLOOD - Fresh out of the oven!

Hi :) I did inline comments as I read--hope they help :) Hello guys :) Haven't been on here for a while working on my new novel called Fairy Blood. Be harsh and please guys what I really want to know is if and if you like the premise. Let me know! Agent, Ricardo is a vampire, once a young Spanish sa...
by Hyaline
August 17th, 2010, 1:42 pm
Forum: Writing
Topic: Favorite Part of Writing
Replies: 23
Views: 8115

Re: Favorite Part of Writing

I love revising and editing, because I love finding problems and fixing them. But really, the initial creating is my favorite--crafting words on paper. Nothing beats plucking a phrase from your head and employing it just the way you want it.

Least favorite part is formatting :)
by Hyaline
August 17th, 2010, 9:58 am
Forum: Queries
Topic: New Historical Novel
Replies: 14
Views: 2397

Re: New Historical Novel

This sounds like a fascinating project--I love historical fiction, but I feel like this would appeal to a lot of people, with so much action happening! I've made comments inline--I hope it helps a little. Please disregard anything that isn't useful :) [quote="lvcabbie"][Is either one of these any be...
by Hyaline
August 17th, 2010, 9:36 am
Forum: Queries
Topic: Query: The Between People - first time attempt
Replies: 8
Views: 1254

Re: Query: The Between People - first time attempt

Hi there--very cool idea. Nice work on the revision--this round is much better :) OK. Thanks again for the advice. Here is another revision. I think that before I was confused about just how much is too much to share. Coming down from writing the entire book, it's easy to want to encapsulate every i...