Search found 85 matches

by Meredith
June 25th, 2010, 12:03 am
Forum: Queries
Topic: BLOOD WILL TELL, Urban Fantasy, Temporarily Retired
Replies: 34
Views: 5226

Re: BLOOD WILL TELL, Urban Fantasy, third version

Last(?) Version: Valeriah is half werewolf, unable to take wolf form but still inconveniently driven by the full moon. Running helps; a tired werewolf is a good werewolf. However, her strength and instincts suit her perfectly as a bodyguard for the members of the Council of Magical Races. When her c...
by Meredith
June 23rd, 2010, 8:39 pm
Forum: Queries
Topic: The Red Room - Query letter
Replies: 6
Views: 1177

Re: The Red Room - Query letter

Hi all, I'm just learning the art of query-writing, and would really appreciate some feedback on my own if possible. It is basically a chick-lit novel and difficult to write a plot that is based mainly in emotion and not actions, but this is the best I've come up with so far - Dear Agent, I am seek...
by Meredith
June 22nd, 2010, 11:49 pm
Forum: Queries
Topic: Query: Use Somebody *Updated*
Replies: 31
Views: 5114

Re: Query: Use Somebody *Updated*

Dear [ Agent’s name ]: Teenager Rachel McSwain is convinced she has only thirteen months left to live when she is compelled to be an experiment for the US government. I find this sentence confusing. Teenager is pretty unspecific--it covers everything from 13 to 19. Can you say, "At sixteen, Rachel ...
by Meredith
June 22nd, 2010, 6:05 pm
Forum: Queries
Topic: BLOOD WILL TELL, Urban Fantasy, Temporarily Retired
Replies: 34
Views: 5226

Re: BLOOD WILL TELL, Urban Fantasy, third version

Is giving a personal web site a bit to pushy? I have no idea. Just asking because it's a great idea! I think your query is tight and very well written. I would request sample chapters after reading it. Thanks. I finally feel like I may be getting close with this version. Need to send out a few more...
by Meredith
June 21st, 2010, 11:58 am
Forum: Queries
Topic: Vicesteed Query - Revised!
Replies: 15
Views: 2363

Re: Vicesteed Query - Revised!

From the name 'vicesteed', I'm imagining that her experiences are broadcast to a single person at a time. Like a rider, along for experiences they wouldn't care for or wouldn't dare in real life. If that's true, you might want to emphasize it and if not, clarify. Since you have a scripted performanc...
by Meredith
June 19th, 2010, 2:13 pm
Forum: Queries
Topic: Query for Darkness Becomes Her
Replies: 23
Views: 3556

Re: Query for Darkness Becomes Her

I've never written a query before so any and all help is appreciated Thanks in advance! Dear Please consider representing my novel Darkness Becomes Her . The title should be in all caps. But drop this sentence altogether. The agent knows why you're sending them a query. Darkness Becomes Her is a pa...
by Meredith
June 19th, 2010, 2:02 pm
Forum: Queries
Topic: Query for Darkness Becomes Her
Replies: 23
Views: 3556

Re: Query for Darkness Becomes Her

I completely disagree with the post above - you don't have to pay for anything to become a novelist, or to get your work published. If somebody wants money from you, I'd strongly advise you to tell them where to go. Agreed. If you're looking for an online writers' group other than this one, there a...
by Meredith
June 19th, 2010, 12:01 am
Forum: Queries
Topic: Hidden in Shadows - Urban Fantasy
Replies: 20
Views: 3565

Re: Hidden in Shadows - Urban Fantasy

I've heard it's very dangerous to write queries from the POV of the character. Unless you know the agent likes that sort of thing, stick to a 3rd person query, even if the book is in 1st. DK Probably true. But writing it in first person could still be a useful exercise to get to the voice and find ...
by Meredith
June 18th, 2010, 7:20 am
Forum: Queries
Topic: Query Help- FORSAKEN
Replies: 40
Views: 6941

Re: Query Help- FORSAKEN

There's nothing wrong with starting the query (and synopsis) a little early. Sometimes, I wish I had. Experience tells me it's going to take some time to get them right. Here goes another round. :) Revision 3 Dear Agent, Over the past forty years, the land of Echin has experienced bloodshed at the ...
by Meredith
June 16th, 2010, 10:20 pm
Forum: Queries
Topic: TO SAVE A KINGDOM mg adventure
Replies: 12
Views: 1728

Re: TO SAVE A KINGDOM mg adventure

The last version had tense change problems. Any feedback on this one would be great. I still didn't get the hook into the first sentence; I really struggled with that. Thanks Meredith and Quill for the feedback so far. Dear Agent, Marvin is a twelve-year-old boy who crawls into a hole to escape fro...
by Meredith
June 15th, 2010, 6:14 pm
Forum: Queries
Topic: BLOOD WILL TELL, Urban Fantasy, Temporarily Retired
Replies: 34
Views: 5226

Re: Query for BLOOD WILL TELL, Urban Fantasy

Newest version: Dear Agent: Valeriah is half werewolf, unable to take wolf form but still inconveniently driven by the full moon. Her werewolf strength and instincts make her a formidable bodyguard for the members of the Council of Magical Races. When her cousin’s life is threatened, Valeriah expect...
by Meredith
June 14th, 2010, 11:47 pm
Forum: Queries
Topic: The Incredible Race Query Letter
Replies: 57
Views: 7077

Re: The Incredible Race Query Letter

For whatever it's worth, here's one of the crazy things I was thinking about this afternoon (sadly, this is the sort of thing that happens when you've got too much time on your hands). So the question is: at what point, as a commercial artist, do you just shut up and listen to people - and at what ...
by Meredith
June 14th, 2010, 11:39 pm
Forum: Queries
Topic: BLOOD WILL TELL, Urban Fantasy, Temporarily Retired
Replies: 34
Views: 5226

Re: Query for BLOOD WILL TELL, Urban Fantasy

Hey, Meredith, I like the new version much better. I also want to say that it might be easier for us readers if you post your new versions in line in the thread, not up at the top of the first post. And then you can announce it by amending the thread title, if you like. It's how most queries here a...
by Meredith
June 14th, 2010, 10:25 pm
Forum: Queries
Topic: BLOOD WILL TELL, Urban Fantasy, Temporarily Retired
Replies: 34
Views: 5226

Re: Query for BLOOD WILL TELL, Urban Fantasy

Revised version posted above.
by Meredith
June 14th, 2010, 3:46 pm
Forum: Nominate Your Query or First Page for a Critique on the Blog
Topic: Nominate Your Query for a Critique on the Blog
Replies: 213
Views: 122142

Re: Nominate Your Query for a Critique on the Blog

Dear Agent: Being a half-blood is inconvenient even on a good day, especially when the half you got from your mother is werewolf. Valeriah can’t take wolf form but she is still driven by the full moon. Running helps; a tired werewolf is a good werewolf. She’s found her niche, though, using her enhan...