Search found 24 matches

by bookwatcher
July 22nd, 2010, 1:35 pm
Forum: Queries
Topic: QUERY - Toxic *REVISION 3*
Replies: 15
Views: 2925

Re: QUERY - Toxic (YA Urban Fiction)

Where I don't have any actual feedback on how good or bad your query is (I'm horrible at it, if you read mine) but I just wanted to mention that I loved it personally as a reader and it sounds intriguing. If I was in a bookstore (or most likely online) and read it, I would definitely buy it! Since m...
by bookwatcher
July 22nd, 2010, 12:41 pm
Forum: Queries
Topic: Query for Book of the Watchers-YA Horror *A new angle*
Replies: 30
Views: 5936

Re: Query for Book of the Watchers-YA Fantasy

Thanks for the feedback so far. I've changed some of the grammatical errors so that hopefully it won't get in the way of what's written.
by bookwatcher
July 22nd, 2010, 1:05 am
Forum: Queries
Topic: Query for Book of the Watchers-YA Horror *A new angle*
Replies: 30
Views: 5936

Query for Book of the Watchers-YA Horror *A new angle*

Please see end of the post for current query. Thanks! I've been away for awhile because I've re-edited my story. I'm now ready to dive head first (ouch) into the query pool again. Thanks in advance for all of you who rip it apart. I want it good and my thin skin has put on a few more layers. So bri...
by bookwatcher
April 5th, 2010, 5:50 pm
Forum: Queries
Topic: QUERY - THE NAMELESS
Replies: 11
Views: 2760

Re: QUERY - THE NAMELESS

I had no problem understanding what was going on at the beginning. But I live for things like this, and my query letter got ripped to shreds, so what do I know! ha! I think you did a great job of hooking the reader and also explaining the premise of the story. My only advice isn't anything new. I th...
by bookwatcher
April 1st, 2010, 9:43 am
Forum: Queries
Topic: Book of the Watchers-revised
Replies: 9
Views: 1656

Re: Book of the Watchers-query

Thanks for pointing that out, Quill. I looked it up and it doesn't mean what I thought it meant. It's some kind of fantasy, though. Teen Fantasy, maybe?
by bookwatcher
March 31st, 2010, 5:59 pm
Forum: Queries
Topic: Book of the Watchers-revised
Replies: 9
Views: 1656

Re: Book of the Watchers-query

Wow, I'm floored at the responses. Thank you so much. I knew it was bad, but at least now I have a direction to take it in. I was so worried about posting for people to see, but all of your advice was constructive and positive. I'm going back to the drawing board and with your advice in mind hopeful...
by bookwatcher
March 31st, 2010, 5:08 pm
Forum: Queries
Topic: Book of the Watchers-revised
Replies: 9
Views: 1656

Book of the Watchers-revised

This is try number three. It's been quite awhile since I updated because I've re-edited my story. I'm now ready to dive head first (ouch) into the query pool again. Thanks in advance for all of you who rip it apart. I want it good and my thin skin has put on a few more layers. So bring it on! :) Dea...
by bookwatcher
March 31st, 2010, 4:50 pm
Forum: Queries
Topic: Query-Akasha one more time...I think
Replies: 16
Views: 4235

Re: Query-Akasha

Okay, I'm new at this too, but I'm going to try. For me it's about the flow and understanding what's happening. I think you should put what the note said in quotes so that it's clearer "I found you". Less than forty-eight hours later , while it's not confusing, it seems a little off. (and again with...
by bookwatcher
March 31st, 2010, 4:28 pm
Forum: Queries
Topic: Query- Isabella Vampirella (EVIL EDITOR response at end)
Replies: 36
Views: 6734

Re: Query- Isabella Vampirella

I think you should leave the name and spelling the same and here's my reason: the world is all a flutter with the well known vampire story of Bella and Edward. I have children in this age group and they are always asking me why I won't read them the books. They want to be as involved in the world as...