Search found 34 matches
- June 15th, 2010, 3:53 pm
- Forum: Finding An Agent
- Topic: Slow-ass query response?
- Replies: 8
- Views: 3698
Slow-ass query response?
Is there some industry-wide slowdown I'm not aware of going on right now? About a month ago I got my query to a much stronger place and sent it out to six different agents. Other than a couple "we've received your query" responses, I haven't heard a peep, not even a form rejection. As suck...
- June 14th, 2010, 2:45 pm
- Forum: Nominate Your Query or First Page for a Critique on the Blog
- Topic: Nominate Your Query for a Critique on the Blog
- Replies: 213
- Views: 186236
Re: Nominate Your Query for a Critique on the Blog
Dear Mr. Bransford: If not for the handicap of being only twelve years old, Brock Rockster would be the man’s man to end all men’s men. Brock is daring. He’s quick-witted. He’s adored by the media. He’s a prodigious world champion mustache grower. And until this afternoon, when he falsely accused a ...
- June 11th, 2010, 10:07 pm
- Forum: Queries
- Topic: MG Mystery Query
- Replies: 4
- Views: 1809
MG Mystery Query
Here it is, for the bazillionth time, any help is welcome: Dear Ms. Agentpants: If not for the handicap of being only twelve years old, Brock Rockster would be the man’s man to end all men’s men. Brock is daring. He’s quick-witted. He’s adored by the media. He’s a prodigious world champion mustache ...
- June 11th, 2010, 10:06 pm
- Forum: Writing
- Topic: "Boy books"
- Replies: 17
- Views: 6868
"Boy books"
Here's a point of confusion for you: I've read in a number of agent's wish (or anti-wish) lists calling for more "boy books". So what in the hell exactly is a boy book? I'm a boy. I've read a number of books. Many of these have appealed to me, and many have not, for a wide variety of reaso...
- June 11th, 2010, 6:15 pm
- Forum: Nominate Your Query or First Page for a Critique on the Blog
- Topic: Nominate Your First Page for a Critique on the Blog
- Replies: 720
- Views: 458290
Re: Nominate Your First Page for a Critique on the Blog
Gone, Kitty, Gone: A Brock Rockster Mystery Middle-grade mystery/comedy I smashed my steel-toed loafer through the front door and tumbled in, where I landed face-first on the floor of the large, dark foyer. “Worst! Day! Ever!” I yelled. I knew everyone in the house was sleeping, but I didn’t care. I...
- May 8th, 2010, 12:16 am
- Forum: Queries
- Topic: Fantasy Query, feedback please
- Replies: 9
- Views: 3737
Re: Fantasy Query, feedback please
Definitely too many fragmented sentences, such as the first sentence of the last paragraph. I'm also still having trouble grasping the main plotline. Is there a plan to fight the villain, or is the only decision reside in staying or going?
- May 8th, 2010, 12:07 am
- Forum: Queries
- Topic: Mustache Query
- Replies: 8
- Views: 3206
Re: Mustache Query
Thanks for the help. And while I imagine most people are familiar with the term, here's a nice Urban Dictionary definition: Who is the Man's Man? He's the real class act. He always shaves and wears clothes that fit. He's worldly, educated, and a gentleman. He thinks that buttoned shirts are not just...
- May 7th, 2010, 9:30 pm
- Forum: Queries
- Topic: Mustache Query
- Replies: 8
- Views: 3206
Re: Mustache Query
Okay okay okay, I really appreciate all the help so far, here's my next crack at it: If Brock Rockster wasn’t just a twelve-year-old two-type prodigy, he’d be the man’s man to end all men’s men. Brock is daring. He’s strong. He’s quick-witted. He’s adored by the media. He’s a world champion mustache...
- May 7th, 2010, 8:58 am
- Forum: Queries
- Topic: Mustache Query
- Replies: 8
- Views: 3206
Re: Mustache Query
Wow, that's a fantastic amount of help, I really appreciate it. Anyone else have something to add?
- May 6th, 2010, 8:21 pm
- Forum: Queries
- Topic: Mustache Query
- Replies: 8
- Views: 3206
Mustache Query
Okay, one more attempt, complete with minor tweaks, in case anyone out there still cares: If not for the handicap of being only twelve years old, Brock Rockster would be the man’s man to end all men’s men. Brock is daring. He’s quick-witted. He’s adored by the media. He’s a prodigious world champion...
- February 17th, 2010, 8:58 am
- Forum: Queries
- Topic: Does my query meat taste good?
- Replies: 3
- Views: 2319
Re: Does my query meat taste good?
I'd post the 'boilerplate basics' of the other paragraphs so we can get a better idea of the flow. As for the meat, it's in need of some work. I'd cut the first sentence, because as far as I've read, agents don't want you listing the themes. As for the rest...it's in need of some expansion. Who is C...
- February 16th, 2010, 4:50 pm
- Forum: Queries
- Topic: Middle Grade Query
- Replies: 8
- Views: 6879
Re: Middle Grade Query
If more people give me feedback on this, I will absolutely give you a high-five if we meet in person. That's a guarantee.
- February 15th, 2010, 8:56 pm
- Forum: Queries
- Topic: Thriller Query (Genre, that is). Open to Suggestions!
- Replies: 18
- Views: 8040
Re: Thriller Query (Genre, that is). Open to Suggestions!
Agreed, this story sounds like it has some heat to it, but an agent is definitely going to want to know more about the story if they're going to request a larger sample. My largest issue is: what are the characters fighting against? You say the crimes in Faith are all seemingly unrelated, so are the...
- February 15th, 2010, 7:27 pm
- Forum: Queries
- Topic: Middle Grade Query
- Replies: 8
- Views: 6879
Re: Middle Grade Query
Okay, to make sure we aren't getting recommendations on the same things repeatedly, here is an updated draft, and thank you so much for the tips!: Dear Ms. Agentpants : Most people would say that Brock Rockster is a prodigy. They’d say that his skills as a celebrated private investigator to the star...
- February 15th, 2010, 5:32 pm
- Forum: Queries
- Topic: Query "Blood of Ihdun' YA Urban Fantasy
- Replies: 24
- Views: 8851
Re: Query "Blood of Ihdun'
You must have received some solid help, because this is a pretty clean little query. A couple thoughts: I know it says they're elves pretty quickly afterward, but just a few words giving a bit more clarity on how her grandmother was blocking her memories would be helpful, and I'm guessing that given...