Nathan Bransford - The Forums

I couldn't find anything that would really need changing. You could connect the three consecutive paragraphs after the first line and make them one, but i don't that's a must even if some sites advice it. And add something about yourself that could help with the book's publishing like previous books...

Thanks for the advices Literary Flamingo. Hope I followed them to the letter.

Dear Mr. N: Two lovers lie upon one another, the cold embrace of death making their tangled bodies white as they floated in the cooling waters of a bathtub, while a husband stumbles out of a dark motel room, his mind reeling with past guilt. A Cuckoo by the Window, a dark literary drama of 35,186 wo...

Thanks for reviewing my query letter, waiting for your comments. Dear Mr. N: When Charles Radcliffe, the richest man in Silver River, falls for his suspicions and tries to find out why his soon-to-be ex-wife was lying to him, a series of inexplicable events lead to his killing both her and her lover...

I'm no expert, but I found only a few things I would have added, like something to let the agent know that the full manuscript is readily available upon request. And add something to let them know that you appreciate their spending precious time on you. I think the rest is fine.