Nathan Bransford - The Forums

I'm sure you know this, but you should also include prior sales history. Or at least be prepared to answer the question. If it were me, I'd boil down all of the positive reviews into succinct bullets and only choose the top two or three. I absolutely agree with the examples given by Gabrielle. Big a...

Here is the next attempt: Seventeen-year-old Autumn Reed is an Elementalist, the rarest kind of Lumen, able to control the four elements. Lumen, meaning light, are gifted individuals who live amongst us and can conjure magic. When Autumn receives her gifts, a civil war erupts. She has no idea how ma...

Okay. Scalpels ready? Here's the next revision: Dear Amazing Agent, Seventeen-year-old Autumn Reed is an Elementalist, the rarest kind of Lumen, able to control the four elements. Lumen, meaning light, are gifted individuals who live amongst us and can conjure magic. When Autumn receives her gifts, ...

I'm going to list my thoughts as I read the letter. I hope it helps. :) I am seeking representation for FORSAKEN my 30,000 word (still working on draft) YA fantasy. (SCREECH! Agents don't want to be queried with unfinished manuscripts. I'm sure you know this, but I felt it needed to be said. Also, s...

That might be a good "Ask Agent" question for either Nathan's thread or Twitter's #askagent.

The advice I've gotten is to limit it to 2 pages, but it could be wrong.

Revision 1: Seventeen-year-old Autumn Reed can control the four elements, which sounds great in theory, but not when it rips apart her family and ignites a war. Autumn is an Elementalist, the rarest kind of Lumen or gifted individual. She has no idea magic exists or how many people want to exploit h...

Wow, notw. I'm honored to be the catalyst for your first comment. :) You did very well. Thank you for your comments. I hope you'll check out the revision when I post it. I'd love your feedback.

I don't know you guys, but I love you. This is EXACTLY what I needed to hear, er, read. Thank you so much. I'll be sure to post my revision for further decimation. Yoshima – Yep. You’re right. It’s too vague and cliché. Ebradmon – I appreciate you getting back at me. ;) Thanks for your comments – ve...

Thank you so much for posting this. :) I honestly thought I was going crazy with all of my vacillating.

Dear [Agent's name]: It is a fact that no one is too virtuous for the Lord, and no one is too malfunctioned for the Lord to give up on. No matter how murky the sin, the Lord can deliver forgiveness even if the world can’t. It all has to do with faith. (I'm not digging this as your hook. It sounds t...

Things break around Yari (last name?) . The more complicated the machine the more spectacular its demise. As if her world of technology deprivation is not (I think it's okay to use "isn't" here) quirky enough, one of the homes she’s “borrowing” is robbed by a misfit group of men. Men who ...

REVISION(s) POSTED. First off, I promise to haunt this forum and try my best to provide constructive feedback to others. ---- My request: Please destroy this query letter - it's the only way it's going to get better. Thanks in advance for your help!! Dear Awesome Agent: When seventeen year-old Autu...