Nathan Bransford - The Forums

Hey GeeGee! I haven't read your previous versions so this is with fresh eyes. :) REVISION #1 My sister remarked to me that after so many versions, the query must feel like word hash. Yes. Yes, it does. (Oh man. Yeah. I can't tell up from down with mine right now.) Is this version any better? (Just f...

Agreed. That's just bad form on their part. And it's obviously not true. Look at those requests your racking up. :)

If your query is less than 300 words, it should fit on a page. Mine got up to 390 at one point and it still had room to spare at the bottom (12 pt, single-spaced like a business letter should be, with one line between paragraphs). I'm thinking, like Holly, that your contact info is spread out or you...

Nick, your writing cracks me up (in a good way).

JUSTINE!!!!

!!!!

Keep me posted on what happens!! Good luck!!

Hey shadow! Dear Super Agent, Salina Edwards is devastated when her boyfriend of five years, Nick, unexpectedly passes away from cancer. She is left with no more than a vast abyss of emptiness ("vast abyss of emptiness" sounds kind of melodramatic to me, to be honest) and a list that cont...

Hey StayPositive! Thanks for your feedback on my query conundrum. I hope my comments will be helpful to you. :) Having read through many entries on these forums, plus other "agent help" blogs referenced here, I have rewritten a Query in a style I hope is more Northern Hemisphere. Although ...

Editing is painful. Here's my latest baby. It physically hurt to press the backspace button. (but hey my book is 17,000 words lighter than when it began!) Bev had heard that money went further in small towns than in the city, but this was ridiculous! Why did anyone stay in the cities? Aw, I love yo...

Hey Serzen! Dear $Agent, You have an average job (Oh my. I can see an agent raising their brows at this. They get queires that start with the "I am..." intro or straight to the story and everything in between, and might not get at first that you're launching into the story. Rephrase?) ; it...

Hey all! I deleted the old query, so the only one here is the revised version. I need all the help I can get. Dear Agent: Rights-to-life activist Betty B. sees herself as the soil that lies unnoticed beneath the beauty of flowers (I know what you mean here, but I'm wondering why. Activists are well...

Hi CC13! I'm not a query expert either, so take or leave whatever you wish. :) Hello all! Trying to get this thing as good as possible, so any thoughts or suggestions are welcome. Thanks in advance! Jessa Whitley knows she’s got no business being the next Hercules. Sure, she’s obsessed with everyth...

Hey bunderful! More feedback for you. Eliora's life is shattered by a midnight phone call. (Great!) Her photographer husband Micha was killed by a suicide bomber while out for a beer with some buddies after a photo shoot in Tel Aviv (There's too much backstory stuffed in here; the conflict gets lost...

Just wanted to drop by and say how much I enjoyed reading this. I don't have much to add; the others have done a great job so I won't repeat. And the ending (not the last sentence, of course) made me go "but, but...I need to know more!! Give more now, or Hulk smash!" :) *sends oodles of wa...

Me first! ;) Kudos for posting--I know how hard that is! Hope this helps you out! So, this is the opening scene (the first 450 words) of my story. This is what I've been sending as the writing sample with my query when the agent says they'll take the first few pages. If you feel up to it, please re...

Still too rough I know, but I'm ready for round 2. (I know Remus, it's still too long! I'm trying, really!) Thanks again, you guys! Dear Wonderful Agent, Sixteen-year-old Haley Martin doesn’t like conflict. She keeps her head down and stays out of trouble. She doesn’t know that trouble has been see...