Search found 15 matches
- October 7th, 2012, 5:05 pm
- Forum: Synopses and Plot Outlines
- Topic: The Vampire Next Door-Paranormal Romance- Synopsis-1st Draft
- Replies: 2
- Views: 10218
Re: The Vampire Next Door-Paranormal Romance- Synopsis-1st Draft
Thanks Shipple for all your wonderful advice. I've made some changes that hopefully makes the synopsis a lot better. I also made a shorter version for those agents who only want a page or two but your advice really helped me to polish it so much more. Thanks for the fresh eyes! RAINE JENSEN was born...
- September 23rd, 2012, 3:36 pm
- Forum: Synopses and Plot Outlines
- Topic: The Vampire Next Door-Paranormal Romance- Synopsis-1st Draft
- Replies: 2
- Views: 10218
The Vampire Next Door-Paranormal Romance- Synopsis-1st Draft
Hello Everyone, This is my first attempt at a synopsis; which was as hard to write as the query. I plan to submit to one agent who wants a 3-5 paragraph synopsis, but I decided to do a longer one in anticipation for those agents who will request it. I'm thinking once I get the longer one as perfect ...
- August 19th, 2012, 10:58 am
- Forum: Queries
- Topic: Need Help With Query
- Replies: 16
- Views: 8974
Re: Need Help With Query
I intend to do just that and focus on perfecting the book before I begin quering agents in September. While I wait to hear from them I'll begin work on the dreaded synopsis but after revising the book four times and the query about forty, I'm hoping writing the synopsis won't be as difficult. But th...
- August 18th, 2012, 5:32 pm
- Forum: Queries
- Topic: Need Help With Query
- Replies: 16
- Views: 8974
Re: Need Help With Query
Hi geogstacey, Thanks for your advice. Hopefully this raises the stakes without giving too much detail and slowing the flow of the query. Dear Agent, Raine Jensen grew up with devoutly religious parents who labeled everything as good or evil, and seeing ghosts was definitely evil. At thirteen, Raine...
- August 16th, 2012, 2:14 pm
- Forum: Queries
- Topic: Need Help With Query
- Replies: 16
- Views: 8974
Re: Need Help With Query
I like this version, it flows nicely. One suggestion: your comment earlier implied that something specific happens that prevents Roman from killing Raine, and thus allowing time for his (conflicted) feelings towards her to develop. Is there a way to work that into the query? I feel like it would ra...
- August 14th, 2012, 11:12 am
- Forum: Queries
- Topic: Need Help With Query
- Replies: 16
- Views: 8974
Re: Need Help With Query
Hi Kristie, Thanks again for your wonderful advice. Instead of explaning some of the areas that were a little confusing I decided to just revise them and hopefully now it's better. An agent could have the same reaction you did but I won't get a chance to explain myself and if I have to it means the ...
- August 13th, 2012, 5:12 pm
- Forum: Queries
- Topic: Need Help With Query
- Replies: 16
- Views: 8974
Query Revision
Here is the revised query. Any feedback welcome. Dear Agent, Raine Jensen grew up with devoutly religious parents who labeled everything as good or evil, and seeing ghosts was definitely evil. At thirteen Raine's black and white world blurs to gray after she helps a ghost bring her killer to justice...
- August 13th, 2012, 4:30 pm
- Forum: Queries
- Topic: Need Help With Query
- Replies: 16
- Views: 8974
Re: Need Help With Query
Hello gnf, Thanks for your advice on my query. It always helps to have fresh eyes look at something you've read a thousand times. My comments are in red. Thirty-year-old Raine Jensen grew up with devoutly religious parents who labeled everything as good or evil, and seeing ghosts was definitely evil...
- August 12th, 2012, 3:33 pm
- Forum: Queries
- Topic: Need Help With Query
- Replies: 16
- Views: 8974
query revised
Revised Query Dear Agent, Thirty-year-old Raine Jensen grew up with devoutly religious parents who labeled everything as good or evil, and seeing ghosts was definitely evil. Her black and white world blurs to gray after Raine helps a ghost bring her killer to justice. Still Raine fears being a mediu...
- August 12th, 2012, 12:59 am
- Forum: Queries
- Topic: Need Help With Query
- Replies: 16
- Views: 8974
Re: Need Help With Query
Hello Lurking Virologist, Thank you so much for all your suggestions, I think many of them were very good. There are some choices I'd like to explain though. Red is something I'd consider deleting , and blue text is linked to [a comment] "Thirty-year-old Raine Jensen grew up with devoutly relig...
- August 11th, 2012, 12:05 am
- Forum: Excerpts
- Topic: Prologue of romance novel
- Replies: 2
- Views: 6149
Prologue of romance novel
Hello All, Would love any feedback on my query. Thanks in advance. Anastasia Bach felt the long, cold skeletal hands of death reach for her, but she managed to evade its deadly grasp. The dark angel would have to catch her, and she had no intention of letting that happen until she’d made a plea for ...
- August 10th, 2012, 11:59 pm
- Forum: Excerpts
- Topic: First 637 words of my novel, The Phoenix: A Gathering
- Replies: 10
- Views: 8055
Re: First 637 words of my novel, The Phoenix: A Gathering
Hi Kristie, I happen to like prologues! Writers often use them to give insight into a different character from the main POV. In revising yours I think you have to think about how this person and this information will play out in the rest of the book. Are there things about him that will affect the m...
- August 10th, 2012, 9:43 pm
- Forum: Queries
- Topic: Need Help With Query
- Replies: 16
- Views: 8974
Revision of Query
Thanks to Kristie, here is the improved version. Dear Agent, Thirty-year-old Raine Jensen grew up with devoutly religious parents who labeled everything as good or evil, and seeing ghosts was definitely evil. The black and white her parents taught her to see blur to gray after Raine helps a ghost br...
- August 10th, 2012, 12:38 pm
- Forum: Queries
- Topic: Need Help With Query
- Replies: 16
- Views: 8974
Need Help With Query
Hello everyone, I'd love some feedback on my query. I am concerned about creating a voice and giving a good sense of what my book is about. Dear Agent, Raine Jensen grew up with overly-religious parents who labeled everything as good or evil, and seeing ghosts was definitely evil. The line blurs a l...
- August 10th, 2012, 11:47 am
- Forum: Queries
- Topic: Revised Query for THE FINAL CLUE
- Replies: 16
- Views: 9301
Re: Revised Query for THE FINAL CLUE
Hello, I am new to this forum. I really like the concept of your book. I agree that Nora Roberts' Blue Smoke sounds like a good read for you. This sounds like a romance and I'd like to see more of the conflict between Gina and Joey. What has she experienced in her life that makes her want to run fro...