Search found 97 matches

by LurkingVirologist
May 8th, 2013, 1:36 am
Forum: Queries
Topic: Query for ST. JOHNS: a new outlook
Replies: 3
Views: 6619

Re: Query for ST. JOHNS: a new outlook

Hey builder, Your query is definitely improving, and it's good that you're taking suggestions and making changes. You've definitely streamlined it. Here are a few thoughts off the top of my head... A) You're jumping between present and past tense a lot, and it's jumbling things up. It also seems to ...
by LurkingVirologist
May 7th, 2013, 1:19 am
Forum: Queries
Topic: New Query: Shadowplay
Replies: 2
Views: 4066

New Query: Shadowplay

Revision fatigue. I haz it. Thus, I'll distract myself with the literary equivalent of hitting your thumb with a hammer so one stops noticing the headache. Also known as the query letter. I've got two opening lines I'm trying to decide between, then onto the rest of the query. Pick, choose, suggest,...
by LurkingVirologist
November 27th, 2012, 11:39 pm
Forum: Books
Topic: What are you reading now?
Replies: 520
Views: 137756

Re: What are you reading now?

Recent... Re-read The Things They Carried by Tim O'Brian Updated version of Holiday's On Ice by David Sedaris God Is Not Great by Hitchens The Commitment by Dan Savage I'm about halfway through Forge of Darkness in Steven Erikson's new Kharkanas trilogy, and the amount of backstory bread-crumb layin...
by LurkingVirologist
November 27th, 2012, 11:27 pm
Forum: Procrastination
Topic: Has it gotten you yet?
Replies: 18
Views: 7422

Re: Has it gotten you yet?

I've never gotten a flu shot on the theory that I'd build up my immune system as much as I could while I was still young & relatively healthy. That's a pretty common sentiment (e.g. I'm not picking on you personally ;) ), but unfortunately the risks outweigh the benefits. Part of the elevated risk ...
by LurkingVirologist
November 27th, 2012, 2:17 am
Forum: Writing
Topic: Realistic Action
Replies: 7
Views: 1667

Re: Realistic Action

Adding to what's already been said, I think the issue is not so much whether the idea is realistic, so much as just not having it be implausible. The latter bar is easier to clear, and gets lower the funnier and more entertaining the scene is. I for one, as a reader, will forgive a certain amount of...
by LurkingVirologist
November 27th, 2012, 1:21 am
Forum: Writing
Topic: How many Characters do you have?
Replies: 34
Views: 11892

Re: How many Characters do you have?

Interesting to read all the responses here. My WiP is contemporary/UF/paranormal-ish and I'm aiming to cut to around 115K or so. 3 Main PoV characters (roughly equal time given to each) 4 Secondary PoV characters (2-3 scenes each, mostly antagonists) 5ish Non-PoV supporting characters of note (each ...
by LurkingVirologist
November 27th, 2012, 12:31 am
Forum: Queries
Topic: 'The Eyes Have It' urban fantasy query - Revised 11/9/12
Replies: 12
Views: 5753

Re: 'The Eyes Have It' urban fantasy query - Revised 11/9/12

Getting better, but I still feel like you are info-dumping in the query. Aside from the issues of clarity/confusion mentioned above, my first thought would be "I wonder if the whole book is info-dumpy," which is not an impression you probably want to make. The maggots make a good hook, both for thei...
by LurkingVirologist
October 3rd, 2012, 2:15 am
Forum: Excerpts
Topic: First 500 Words - MG Fantasy
Replies: 3
Views: 3866

Re: First 500 Words - MG Fantasy

Works pretty well as an intro. Only got a few minor suggestions: "When his brain got itself squarely back into his head, Eric’s eyes popped open, and he winced at the sandpaper feel of his eyelids as he blinked awake. His heart was still pounding from an unremembered nightmare, and he was sticky wit...
by LurkingVirologist
September 24th, 2012, 2:48 am
Forum: Procrastination
Topic: Has it gotten you yet?
Replies: 18
Views: 7422

Re: Has it gotten you yet?

Interesting news. the FDA has just approved a brand-new vaccine for 2012-2013, which helps to vaccinate three various flu strains. Six companies will be manufacturing the injections. Anybody that has health-related, or immune deficiencies, should check to see if they can get vaccinated as soon as p...
by LurkingVirologist
September 23rd, 2012, 2:34 am
Forum: Synopses and Plot Outlines
Topic: BLESSINGS - YA Fiction
Replies: 1
Views: 3202

Re: BLESSINGS - YA Fiction

This feels much more like a query letter with an ending appended to it then a synopsis. For example, this entire line is superfluous jacket-cover, and doesn't actually explain anything about the plot: "They must work together to save their kingdom. But in two worlds where reality and identity are of...
by LurkingVirologist
September 15th, 2012, 3:09 am
Forum: Writing
Topic: Any genre ideas?
Replies: 4
Views: 1081

Re: Any genre ideas?

I think any use of the phrase 'human cloning' will get it pegged as sci-fi, regardless of how the rest of the book sorts out. Just sayin'. Does YA include many sub-genres of science fiction ('hard' science fiction, near future, speculative, etc.)? Fun fact: identical twins are technically clones. OK...
by LurkingVirologist
September 10th, 2012, 2:45 am
Forum: Writing
Topic: The hardest part of the novel
Replies: 26
Views: 5925

Re: The hardest part of the novel

I'd have to say the middle 1/3rd - that awkward point after everything has started rolling, but isn't quite on a collision course yet...Ugg. That's the part that I'm always hardest on myself about. Probably because I already have the climactic scenes in mind, and setting them up just doesn't feel as...
by LurkingVirologist
September 8th, 2012, 3:36 am
Forum: Queries
Topic: NEWEST REVISION - Query - The Phoenix: A Gathering
Replies: 9
Views: 2135

Re: **REVISED** Query - The Phoenix: A Gathering

One slight re-wording I'd suggest for the middle big. Also, the phrasing "in/for an experimental attempt to eradicate the human race," sounds slightly weird to me, like the attempt is experimental. Can you clarify that the experiment is part of the attempt? Admittedly a bit nit-picky, but everything...
by LurkingVirologist
September 6th, 2012, 1:20 am
Forum: Books
Topic: What are you reading now?
Replies: 520
Views: 137756

Re: What are you reading now?

I'm juggling between Origins by Neil deGrasse Tyson and Arguably , the essay collection from Christopher Hitchens. I'd highly recommend both for anyone interested in a lucid, colloquial account of the cosmos (the former), or a beautifully written and at times jaw-droppingly caustic take-down of Amer...
by LurkingVirologist
September 6th, 2012, 1:11 am
Forum: Procrastination
Topic: Writers Who Run
Replies: 14
Views: 6875

Re: Writers Who Run

OMG do it. I've become sort of a mess over races. It's like every time new batch of races shows up in my email, I want to run them all. I am not supposed to be running at all right now though while my foot heals up. (ARGH) So frustrating. So you have to run for me. Stay off the foot, lol! I've mana...