Nathan Bransford - The Forums

My book doesn't have a name yet, but here's my first shot at a query letter. Dear:______ [Opening hello sentence to personalize letter] On the eve of her eighteenth birthday, Jessalyn Caradine is called upon by the Council to take on a mission. To protect an innocent. To honor her birth right as a ...

Sixteen-year-old Derek thought the biggest challenges in life were on a football field. Now, he's learning there are even greater challenges to face—after death, when he becomes a reaper. I really like the first sentence but this is far too ambiguous. How did he die? If he was an old man then it wo...

I agree about the age issue. I should take that out. However, YA contemporary fiction can run anywhere between 45,000 words and 80,000. Thank you for your input. I definitely feel that I need to revise and lengthen my query. I need to write more about the story and perhaps cut the bio, as what I hav...

I agree. I also felt that there was something missing. Does this sound better? Also, thank you so much for the fast reply. It's great to have someone to bounce ideas of off. Dear Agent, Fifteen year old Zavier Grey’s life was changed forever when a gang fight killed his best friend and left him seve...

I agree with all of your suggestions- they all make complete sense. After reading it again, I felt that the idea of Zavier being accepted by Jazz is a filler and can just be eliminated. Does this sound better? Dear Agent, Fifteen year old Zavier Grey’s life was changed forever when a gang fight kill...

Dear Agent, I am currently seeking representation for JIGSAW BOY, my contemporary young adult novel, complete at 46,000 words. It will appeal to fans of Malorie Blackman, who also approaches serious issues in a realistic, unflinching and ultimately hopeful way. Fifteen year old Zavier Grey’s life wa...

This is my query for my paranormal romance novel THE SCION. I've sent it to one agent... nothing so far but it's only day 2! Please, please give feedback. I need help revising, and I'm not sure which Query is better. Dear __agent___: Seventeen year-old Karen Pensky has never been much of a normal g...