Search found 83 matches
- August 31st, 2022, 8:44 am
- Forum: Queries
- Topic: Query:THE OUTBACK GRACE MOTEL UpmarketFiction
- Replies: 2
- Views: 3892
Re: Query:THE OUTBACK GRACE MOTEL UpmarketFiction
Interesting premise. My initial impulse was a Canterbury Tales vibe from your query, though I see its more from your synopsis. query: I liked the hook, up until the last line. "When the Privileged meet the Powerless somebody’s life will change" The term "Privileged/Privilege" is ...
- August 31st, 2022, 8:18 am
- Forum: Queries
- Topic: Fantasy - Born to Battle
- Replies: 2
- Views: 1878
Re: Fantasy - Born to Battle
Thank you Bernhard. I made some changes, both from what you said and some other feedback. Swapped some sections too, which might go in opposition to your specific feedback, but curious since others suggested it. Dear XXX XXXX, I am writing to seek representation for my first novel, Born to Battle, a...
- August 26th, 2022, 8:58 am
- Forum: Nominate Your Query or First Page for a Critique on the Blog
- Topic: NEW - Nominate Your First Page for a Critique on the Blog
- Replies: 208
- Views: 180602
Re: NEW - Nominate Your First Page for a Critique on the Blog
Title: Born to Battle Markus staggered under the weight of the dead body, finally falling to one knee in exhaustion. After two days, his fur and armor were stiff with dried blood, its copper tang lingering in his nostrils. Around him, the rest of the band walked in respectful silence, not looking at...
- August 26th, 2022, 8:52 am
- Forum: Finding An Agent
- Topic: agent seeks author investment
- Replies: 2
- Views: 5237
Re: agent seeks author investment
If they ask for your money, they are a scam. At best a vanity press, and at worse, outright exploitive.
- August 26th, 2022, 8:49 am
- Forum: Queries
- Topic: Fantasy - Born to Battle
- Replies: 2
- Views: 1878
Fantasy - Born to Battle
Okay, been a while since I've been here due to discouragement with life and my own writing efforts, but I'm rallying my time and resources to have another go at querying. I would appreciate any feedback you can offer. I'll make the rounds to see if I can offer my two pence for others in return (thou...
- May 24th, 2012, 8:02 am
- Forum: Queries
- Topic: YA Contemporary Fiction - 'Jigsaw Boy'
- Replies: 6
- Views: 3654
Re: YA Contemporary Fiction - 'Jigsaw Boy'
It's concise, but perhaps you've made it too much so. We don't want a synopsis, but perhaps give us a bit more to work with. Are there any other major plot events? Tease us with a little more info to bring us in and want to read this story. Right now you spend more time talking about yourself than y...
- May 23rd, 2012, 8:43 pm
- Forum: Queries
- Topic: Query: Hunted
- Replies: 1
- Views: 2125
Re: Query: Hunted
Ok first this comes off as more of a synopsis than a query. At this point the only reason we would read the book now would be to fill in the details. Also, I warn you now, there are a TON of grammar, spelling, punctuation, etc errors in this letter. If you sent something this rough it would be the k...
- May 23rd, 2012, 7:45 pm
- Forum: Queries
- Topic: YA Contemporary Fiction - 'Jigsaw Boy'
- Replies: 6
- Views: 3654
Re: YA Contemporary Fiction - 'Jigsaw Boy'
Wow, a teenager writing this? Very impressive. I know my first attempt at a query wasn't this good :) Dear Agent, I am currently seeking representation for JIGSAW BOY, my contemporary young adult novel, complete at 46,000 words. It will appeal to fans of Malorie Blackman, who also approaches serious...
- May 21st, 2012, 8:49 am
- Forum: Queries
- Topic: Born to Bondage query - Revised final-updated 5/15/12
- Replies: 10
- Views: 5326
Re: Born to Bondage query - Revised final-updated 5/15/12
Thanks for the feedback. I’m glad I included the potion bit too as its effects really are the source of the most immediate dramatic change in the MC and the source of many minor changes in the following novels. To say more would give too much away, but I think it needed to be included. I hadn’t orig...
- May 16th, 2012, 10:54 am
- Forum: Connect With a Critique Partner
- Topic: Contructing a Fantasy Super writing group
- Replies: 49
- Views: 32665
Re: Contructing a Fantasy Super writing group
Well I'm new to this whole field so we'll see. Kinda going by feel here :) What I liked about the sound of DII was, actually, the stringency required by the group. You have to do at least 2 crits of at least 250 words each every month or you're kicked out. For every submission of your own you have t...
- May 16th, 2012, 10:48 am
- Forum: Synopses and Plot Outlines
- Topic: Trees
- Replies: 0
- Views: 11146
Re: Trees
I think you wanted to post this in the query or synopsis thread.
- May 16th, 2012, 10:41 am
- Forum: Queries
- Topic: Suspense Query- The Verge
- Replies: 8
- Views: 4005
Re: Suspense Query- The Verge
Ok, I didn't read the previous versions or the comments, so I'll be doing my best to address this on its own merit. I've taken some of the proffered advice for this next attempt- is this any better? __________________________________ In The Verge , a suspense at 86,000 words, Angela Sheppard has one...
- May 15th, 2012, 2:07 pm
- Forum: Queries
- Topic: Born to Bondage query - Revised final-updated 5/15/12
- Replies: 10
- Views: 5326
Re: Born to Bondage query - Revised final-updated 5/10/12
Ok, taking into consideration the previous comments as well as my "gut" as to what details I really want to focus the story on--at risk of making it seem as if there's not a lot of action, here we go. (I don't know if there's a time limit you're supposed to wait out before reposting, but o...
- May 15th, 2012, 11:41 am
- Forum: Connect With a Critique Partner
- Topic: Contructing a Fantasy Super writing group
- Replies: 49
- Views: 32665
Re: Contructing a Fantasy Super writing group
Thanks. I think I may pass for the first book, but come revisit this for the second. Don't know when that will be though. Might be sooner rather than later. I'm currently bouncing between revising the second, while polishing the first and don't want to overextend myself. I'm considering applying to ...
- May 15th, 2012, 10:27 am
- Forum: Connect With a Critique Partner
- Topic: Contructing a Fantasy Super writing group
- Replies: 49
- Views: 32665
Re: Contructing a Fantasy Super writing group
Well I'm interested, though I confess I'm a little confused about how this would all work, being unfamiliar with the lecture series in question. Perhaps you could give a quick walkthrough of how this exchange would work? I'm kind of with Joe though, I feel like I'm in the final polishing stage befor...