Search found 17 matches

by ebradmon
February 20th, 2010, 3:17 pm
Forum: Queries
Topic: Query Critique - Zombie Queen
Replies: 16
Views: 2989

Re: Query Critique - Zombie Queen

(Bouncing up and down and clamping) Hey, thank you Tara Queries and Lunetta22! I’d disappeared from the grid to go off and stew on how to make the suggested changes. Both of you just totally made my day and gave me back heart! (Like maybe I should get off my butt and actually send out a real query o...
by ebradmon
January 13th, 2010, 2:34 pm
Forum: Queries
Topic: Query Critique - Zombie Queen
Replies: 16
Views: 2989

Re: Query Critique - Zombie Queen

I think of Gold mines, I think of the California gold rush of 18-whatever. – humph– typical Californian – reads about gold and assumes we’re talking about them. I’m sorry but the 49’s gold rush in open-air strip mines was for a bunch of patsies. this is a novel about hunky, sexy zombies – and me’s t...
by ebradmon
January 12th, 2010, 5:08 pm
Forum: Queries
Topic: Query Critique - Zombie Queen
Replies: 16
Views: 2989

Re: Query Critique - Zombie Queen

Hey thank you Dan Krubis! Funny you picked out two words I’d changed form my original query. I added “Back” and changed “Sexy” from “Hot”. Now I’m just going to sit here and watch my head spin – sigh, query writing sucks –humph! And why not gold miner zombies? I kind of see them as the 1900 version ...
by ebradmon
January 10th, 2010, 1:08 am
Forum: Writing
Topic: American dialogue
Replies: 31
Views: 5163

Re: American dialogue

What's a Midwesterner eh? I'm a Denver-ite (true Midwesterner, as we ARE in the middle of the country.) But people in say Saint Louis, and such, call themselves Midwesterners because everything West of the Mississippi is Midwest. TRUST ME, you put us thin air types in a room with them-all and have u...
by ebradmon
January 7th, 2010, 4:22 pm
Forum: Queries
Topic: AUTUMN LEAVES - Query Help
Replies: 19
Views: 3235

Re: AUTUMN LEAVES - Query Help

Me da’love to get back at people. Baw ha ha ha! (I really do hope this helps!) Enjoy Dear Awesome Agent: When seventeen year-old Autumn Reed receives her powers, (how?) she learns her entire life has been based on lies. (oops sorry this is not hooking me – give me a line or idea that has enough det...
by ebradmon
January 7th, 2010, 2:45 pm
Forum: Queries
Topic: Query Critique - Zombie Queen
Replies: 16
Views: 2989

Re: Query Critique - Zombie Queen

Second try... (and yes there were problems brought up in past crit's I'm still trying to figure out how to weave in.) Dear (Mr./Mrs. Agent Who-I’m-Currently-Stalking- ) Things break around Yari. The more complicated the machine the more spectacular its demise. As if her world of technology deprivati...
by ebradmon
January 7th, 2010, 2:41 pm
Forum: Queries
Topic: Query Critique - Zombie Queen
Replies: 16
Views: 2989

Re: Query Critique - Zombie Queen

Thank you Onechoice1 and Hilabeans! Onechoice1 – I’m all squishy headed over the difference between Urban Fantasy (Vampires and Werewolves) and Paranormal Romance (Vampires and Werewolves with sex) … what’s the difference – minus the sex…. I’ll be safe and go with Paranormal Romance – because its gi...
by ebradmon
January 5th, 2010, 10:53 pm
Forum: Queries
Topic: Query Critique - Zombie Queen
Replies: 16
Views: 2989

Re: Query Critique - Zombie Queen

Thank you Yoshima and Shadow! Yoshima – I think the line “hunky zombies” is full of heaps of win also. I mean where can yah go to find that kind of rubbish? Now if only I could figure out how to sneak in the words “zombie sex” into the query…Would.. be.. so.. cool… As for why did I give one protagon...
by ebradmon
January 5th, 2010, 10:27 pm
Forum: Queries
Topic: Query Status: Under Construction
Replies: 30
Views: 4897

Re: Query Status: Under Construction

Wow – great improvement over the first draft! Keep up the great work! Dear [Agent's name]: What the world doesn’t give you, the world can’t take away. It all has to do with faith. Use Somebody is an inspirational romance and is approximately 156,000 words. Seven year olds are typically found playin...
by ebradmon
January 5th, 2010, 10:14 pm
Forum: Finding An Agent
Topic: The same character in a new novel!!
Replies: 5
Views: 1037

Re: The same character in a new novel!!

I think its fine! (Now all you'll don't throw stones at me) But even if the novel did get a full rewrite but it still has the same characters... I still think one could re-query agents with it. Good agents get like a bazillion query's... what's one more even if it may have seen some agent action?
by ebradmon
January 5th, 2010, 3:28 pm
Forum: Queries
Topic: Query Critique - Zombie Queen
Replies: 16
Views: 2989

Query Critique - Zombie Queen

I’m polishing up the old WIP and thought it might be high time to start on the dreaded Query – gasp! Let me know what cha-all think. (Oh, and thank you in advance.) Scroll down for revision. Dear (Mr./Mrs. Agent Who-I’m-Currently-Stalking- ) Things break around Yari. The more complicated the machine...
by ebradmon
January 5th, 2010, 2:10 pm
Forum: Queries
Topic: Query Status: Under Construction
Replies: 30
Views: 4897

Re: Query Status: Under Construction

OneChoice1 wrote:You hit dead on with a concern of mine: rhetorical questions. This is exactly what i needed. Thank you
Great! Gald I could help. Good luck - and I hope this finds a good home out there!
by ebradmon
January 5th, 2010, 1:01 pm
Forum: Queries
Topic: Query Status: Under Construction
Replies: 30
Views: 4897

Re: Query Status: Under Construction

WOW a child mafia boss? Cool! Dear [Agent's name]: It is a fact that no one is too virtuous for the Lord, and no one is too malfunctioned for the Lord to give up on. No matter how murky the sin, the Lord can deliver forgiveness even if the world can’t. It all has to do with faith. What the world doe...
by ebradmon
December 21st, 2009, 2:24 pm
Forum: Queries
Topic: Query Critique--Aurumenas REVISED (again)
Replies: 18
Views: 2938

Re: Query Critique--Aurumenas

Nathadria escaped the dark abyss of a prison ship with a six foot hound snapping at her head only to be thrust into a war of her making. Her enemies kept her in prison for a reason (very vague) and they’ll do anything to get her back, even sacrifice (their delete) millions of soldiers at the hands( ...
by ebradmon
December 16th, 2009, 3:47 pm
Forum: Queries
Topic: Best Way to Pitch/Query for YA series
Replies: 4
Views: 1456

Re: Best Way to Pitch/Query for YA series

Thanks! Knew it was probably in the blog somewhere. Is there anything Nathan hasn't written about? ;-) I have yet to see a blog about the uses of trained seals... So clearly there are some topics yet to be covered. (and would trained seals flippers be able to navigate e-readers? Ah, life’s overridi...