Search found 38 matches

by Lil Tailor
February 29th, 2012, 5:29 pm
Forum: Queries
Topic: QUERY: YA or MG? BOOK I OF THE SIGHT
Replies: 23
Views: 10224

Re: QUERY: YA or MG? BOOK I OF THE SIGHT

*holds up hands* woah I'm not trying to be your adversary :D That said I really like your new query. I think it just needs a little polish honestly, but don't just take my opinion. ** QUERY (sans Brian): When fourteen-year-old Katie aces a quiz everyone else bombs, she discovers she is not just supe...
by Lil Tailor
February 29th, 2012, 1:51 pm
Forum: Queries
Topic: Query: Everybody Knows This Is Nowhere
Replies: 4
Views: 3172

Re: Query: Everybody Knows This Is Nowhere

I'm going to start off by saying what an agent told me once "there is so much clever per square sentence, it's kinda wigging me out" I think the premise is interesting and I definitely like this second one better than the first. I think you're sorta getting lost though. Dwight Howard is an...
by Lil Tailor
February 29th, 2012, 1:42 pm
Forum: Queries
Topic: QUERY: YA or MG? BOOK I OF THE SIGHT
Replies: 23
Views: 10224

Re: QUERY: YA or MG? BOOK I OF THE SIGHT

First, and foremost, you have absolutely no reason to take anything I write seriously. I have no credentials that would indicate, at all, that you should give my comments even a passing thought. I kinda like your old first line better honestly. the "When fourteen-year-old Katie Cranford aces a ...
by Lil Tailor
February 29th, 2012, 10:48 am
Forum: Queries
Topic: Urban fantasy with strong romantic elements,,,please HELP!
Replies: 4
Views: 2804

Re: Urban fantasy with strong romantic elements,,,please HELP!

Keep in mind this is all my opinion and I'm BY NO MEANS an expert. Dear Agent, In the small town of Salem, Massachusetts Anna Mcloud casts one last spell. She puts a curse on true love, before the man she adores executes her on Gallows hill for practicing witchcraft. Three hundred years later, lies,...
by Lil Tailor
February 28th, 2012, 2:32 pm
Forum: Queries
Topic: Query: Frankenstein's Monster: Undead Again -revised post 6
Replies: 10
Views: 4727

Re: Query: Frankenstein's Monster: Undead Again

I want to start by saying when I read this query the first time I was like "This can't be a real story" then it turned kind of into, hmm... I bet this could totally work... In 1887, the Frankenstein Monster spends his days in a cave high in the Austrian Alps, isolating himself from a world...
by Lil Tailor
February 27th, 2012, 5:57 pm
Forum: Queries
Topic: *Revised* QUERY: THE DRAKE WAR
Replies: 40
Views: 15036

Re: *Revised* QUERY: THE DRAKE WAR

I've gotten a bunch of not hits on my last query, so I was wondering about something like this: ** All Lillim Callina wants to do is kill a goddamn dragon. That should be super easy because her entire sixteen-year-old life has been spent being trained by her crazy mother for just such an event. So t...
by Lil Tailor
July 19th, 2011, 7:06 pm
Forum: Queries
Topic: *Revised* QUERY: THE DRAKE WAR
Replies: 40
Views: 15036

Re: *Revised 3rd time* QUERY: THE DRAKE WAR

Hi guys: So I've sent out ten queries with the below query and received only 1 request for a partial. Now, I know this is pretty good, and this is much better than I was originally getting but I can't help but feel maybe something is a bit off. One agent even told me that "You know, there is so...
by Lil Tailor
June 6th, 2011, 12:19 pm
Forum: Synopses and Plot Outlines
Topic: Synopsis: The Drake War
Replies: 5
Views: 5736

Re: Synopsis: The Drake War

What about something like this then? ** Lillim Callina is not what you’d call normal. Sure, she looks like a regular sixteen-year-old girl, but that’s about where the similarities end. To start with, her overbearing, psycho mother is all but consumed with eradicating the supernatural. Hell, she taug...
by Lil Tailor
May 17th, 2011, 2:48 pm
Forum: Synopses and Plot Outlines
Topic: Synopsis: The Drake War
Replies: 5
Views: 5736

Re: Synopsis: The Drake War

I completely re-wrote my synopsis, but I'm thinking its too long (and kinda boring). thoughts? ** Lillim Callina’s day isn’t supposed to go like this. No self-respecting sixteen-year-old girl should start her day with an attack from a supernatural pizza guy. Now granted, he was just delivering a mes...
by Lil Tailor
April 21st, 2011, 1:18 pm
Forum: Finding An Agent
Topic: First Person Synopsis
Replies: 2
Views: 2410

First Person Synopsis

I know a first-person query is frowned upon, but what about a first person synopsis? I've read some conflicting views on this, but I haven't seen anything resembling the semi-squishy facts of this whole endeavor. Any thoughts?
by Lil Tailor
March 4th, 2011, 2:35 pm
Forum: Queries
Topic: *Revised* QUERY: THE DRAKE WAR
Replies: 40
Views: 15036

Re: *Revised 3rd time* QUERY: THE DRAKE WAR

Is this better? This may have gone too far into the realm of the ridiculous though... ** Dear Agent: When gun toting maniacs barge into sixteen year old Lillim Callina’s home and reveal an exciting opportunity to join an ancient, unstoppable dragon before it takes over the world, it means only one t...
by Lil Tailor
March 1st, 2011, 6:10 pm
Forum: Queries
Topic: *Revised* QUERY: THE DRAKE WAR
Replies: 40
Views: 15036

Re: *Revised 3rd time* QUERY: THE DRAKE WAR

Does this sound better? ** When a bunch of gun toting maniacs barge into sixteen year old Lillim Callina’s home and demand that she help them release an ancient, unstoppable dragon, it means only one thing: She needs better locks. Then they went and lit her place on fire. So now, come hell or high w...
by Lil Tailor
February 19th, 2011, 4:46 pm
Forum: Queries
Topic: Query Bleamy's Corner YA historical fiction.
Replies: 4
Views: 2088

Re: Query Bleamy's Corner YA historical fiction.

Dear Agent, In the winter of 1802, Jeremy Bleamy watches his father die and two nights later he follows his mothers footprints in the snow – they end at the edge of London Bridge. Eleven-years-old with no family or friends, he is tempted to follow his mother, but something inside him awakens and he...
by Lil Tailor
February 18th, 2011, 10:50 am
Forum: Queries
Topic: Query: Of Shadows and Angels
Replies: 14
Views: 5669

Re: Query: Of Shadows and Angels

Mmm... don't feel that way. I have like 47 different versions of the same query letter on my computer. I promise, I know how you feel. There is an exercise in one of Nathan's posts (yes I'm going to be that guy) where he tells you to boil your story down to one sentence. Then three... so on and so f...
by Lil Tailor
February 18th, 2011, 1:14 am
Forum: Queries
Topic: Query: Of Shadows and Angels
Replies: 14
Views: 5669

Re: Query: Of Shadows and Angels

Dear Agent Please consider for representation my science fiction novel, OF SHADOWS AND ANGELS, where Layne, a military trainee, is framed as a traitor and must find proof of his innocence deep within enemy territory. The world is a wasteland. Civilisation has fractured into a loose network of isola...