Nathan Bransford - The Forums

Actually, someone on another message board mentioned this as well, but this does reinforce that view. I've already rewritten the first paragraph to fix some of that. Thanks for the link to that blog though. I hadn't seen that one yet.

Just to clarify, I did get it that only three went inside, and had a hint that maybe Rick was a little older, but I wasn't sure. A little more clarity there should be about it. Pretty good writing though. The story flowed very well.

Wow, this is infinitely better than the previous version, IMO. Just a few small things though. Is there some way to mention how many kid there are early on, because it took me a while to fingure there were 4 all together (I think there were 4, right? or did I miss something?), and I found two typos,...

Now that I think about it I'm not really surprised you didn't understand my "captain exposition" comment. Sometimes I forget that certain words and phrases were coined by me, and thus totally incomprehensible to the rest of the world. I suppose it is like captain obvious, only you know, e...

Emily, I purposely did not tell anyone what my story was about because I was wondering how long it would be before someone made reference to Edward Bulwer-Lytton's infamous novel. Congratulations on being the first. But storms are an important part of my novel. The sorcerer, who is the main antagoni...

It was a strange feeling standing in Stevens embrace; In one way I felt uncomfortable, as it felt like he was claiming me. In another way I felt petrified of him , because I was so uncertain of him and his mood swings. But in a third way – I really liked it! Not in a romancy lovey dovey way, but in...

Just curious. Thanks again, your time and attention to this story is very much appreciated.

First off, thanks for the feedback. It is greatly appreciated. The slip into present tense (London is a maritime climate), was actually intentional, not a slip up. I wrote it that way because London still is a maritime climate, not just a maritime climate at the time it was written. Hmm. That's not ...

Just thought I'd give this board a try. Just looking for a little feedback. I know most people who post here post YA fiction because that's what Nathan mainly represents, but I really love his blog, and thought I'd give this critque section a try. I've rewritten this opening several times, and was w...

I agree with others who said it was a pretty strong opening and seems to draw readers in (at least it drew me in a bit). One things stands out to me though is that you mention werewolves in the opening, and then said you took out all the werewolves in the rest of the story. I think whatever is in th...

Hi I'm Classic Camp and I'm an alcoholic (oops, wrong MB). I like to write horror, although I occasionally dabble in other genres. I've a few small successes in getting published, but none big enough to brag about. I have a bachelor's in English writing and a master's in English education, and I tea...

I write horror, and read mostly classics, both in horror and other more mainstream classics. I do also read some modern horror and other genres. I try to read a little of just about everything, but horror is always my main love.