Search found 3 matches

by lana_lorett
June 2nd, 2017, 12:40 am
Forum: Nominate Your Query or First Page for a Critique on the Blog
Topic: NEW - Nominate Your First Page for a Critique on the Blog
Replies: 207
Views: 177516

Re: NEW - Nominate Your First Page for a Critique on the Blog

Title: In Work Genre: YA Sci-fi Planet Gali Mila would hack into the academy’s artificial intelligence computer tonight. No second thoughts, though yes, there was some guilt. She made her way towards the lab complex with a forced blank expression, periodically gazing at the campus grounds, as though...
by lana_lorett
November 12th, 2010, 9:42 pm
Forum: Nominate Your Query or First Page for a Critique on the Blog
Topic: Page Critique Friday 11/12/10
Replies: 16
Views: 92342

Re: Page Critique Friday 11/12/10

First, congratulations for being selected and thanks for your submission. I like the protagonist. She is believable. In addition, knowing that the submission is a paranormal romance intrigues me and makes me want to know more. I do think that the writing needs some tightening. Here are some suggesti...
by lana_lorett
June 9th, 2010, 10:29 pm
Forum: Nominate Your Query or First Page for a Critique on the Blog
Topic: Nominate Your First Page for a Critique on the Blog
Replies: 720
Views: 451460

Re: Nominate Your First Page for a Critique on the Blog

TITLE: Nuvelium Chase GENRE: YA Science Fiction Adventure Word Count: 250 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ CHAPTER 1: ASIG Planet Karpathia Kamiboo Military Prep Space Academy Lab ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The signal that shimmered on Trompetina’s ho...