Search found 6 matches
- August 22nd, 2010, 11:32 am
- Forum: Nominate Your Query or First Page for a Critique on the Blog
- Topic: Nominate Your First Page for a Critique on the Blog
- Replies: 720
- Views: 452928
Re: Nominate Your First Page for a Critique on the Blog
Title: The Suburban Spy Genre: Women's Thriller Hitting a bimbo with my car should have been the most exciting event of my day. Especially because that bimbo was the same one who’d pushed her cleavage in my husband’s face at the Sellner’s dinner party last week. Not that I hit her with my car becaus...
- June 9th, 2010, 9:27 pm
- Forum: Nominate Your Query or First Page for a Critique on the Blog
- Topic: Nominate Your First Page for a Critique on the Blog
- Replies: 720
- Views: 452928
Re: Nominate Your First Page for a Critique on the Blog
Title:The Suburban Spy Genre: chick lit/spy lit Hitting a bimbo with my car should have been the most exciting event of my day. Especially because that bimbo was the same one who’d pushed her cleavage in my husband’s face at the Stellner’s dinner party last week. Not that I hit her with my car becau...
- June 1st, 2010, 7:59 pm
- Forum: Queries
- Topic: Hang A Shining Star- contemporary women's fiction
- Replies: 17
- Views: 6837
Re: Hang A Shining Star- contemporary women's fiction
I really like this query and, most importantly, I want to read this book! I think this last version is good, but I notice the frequent use of "want". She wants to escape, she wants to love them, she wants to have the little-girl feelings, she wants a chance, she wants to reclaim... you see...
- June 1st, 2010, 7:19 pm
- Forum: Queries
- Topic: query #2: The Suburban Spy, edited
- Replies: 10
- Views: 3857
Re: query #1: The Suburban Spy, first version
New to this forum, new to writing. I'd love some feedback on this query. I'll be submitting in the next couple of months. I especially don't know what to do about the bio section-- I have no work experience as a spy :) Dear specific agent, You think you know Liz Murdock, suburban mom of two, wife, a...
- May 19th, 2010, 7:05 am
- Forum: Queries
- Topic: query #2: The Suburban Spy, edited
- Replies: 10
- Views: 3857
Re: query: The Suburban Spy
Thank you for the feedback!
- May 18th, 2010, 6:53 pm
- Forum: Queries
- Topic: query #2: The Suburban Spy, edited
- Replies: 10
- Views: 3857
query #2: The Suburban Spy, edited
This is the latest edit of my query. Thanks to everybody who helped with the last round. I posted the old query after the comments for the old query so you can see both the changes and where it jumps to new comments. Dear specific agent, Liz Murdock is happy with her life in suburbia, her two childr...