Search found 250 matches

by Emily J
October 16th, 2011, 11:48 pm
Forum: Procrastination
Topic: Favorite misheard song lyrics
Replies: 33
Views: 17469

Re: Favorite misheard song lyrics

Rachel Ventura wrote:@ Emily J

About the only one I can think of:

YouTube: Gayla Peevey - Hippopotamus for Christmas
No crocodiles,
No rhinocerossesses,
I only like
Hippopotamussesses,
And hippopotamussesses like me too!
:lol: :lol: :lol:
LOL Thanks now I have fulfilled by rhino quota for songs haha
by Emily J
October 4th, 2011, 8:17 pm
Forum: Procrastination
Topic: Favorite misheard song lyrics
Replies: 33
Views: 17469

Re: Favorite misheard song lyrics

I have a misheard song lyric that I only found out about last week. I really enjoy "Lisztomania" by Phoenix. I was absolutely convinced that the lyrics were: "Like a rhino, not easily offended" Which to me, made sense in a weird way, since Rhino's have very thick skin. BUT, the lyrics are actually: ...
by Emily J
October 4th, 2011, 8:06 pm
Forum: Synopses and Plot Outlines
Topic: The Time
Replies: 3
Views: 4525

Re: The Time

Hey guys, I'm getting ready to send off to my preferred agent and want to see what you think of my synopsis, I'm abit concerned about flow, but feel I'm almost there! All help appreciated! ‘“Teri, you join that game you end up chasing and chasing until you’re the one who gets chased.”’ Teri’s I wou...
by Emily J
October 4th, 2011, 7:30 pm
Forum: Queries
Topic: Query: The Protected (Paranormal Romance)
Replies: 2
Views: 742

Re: Query: The Protected (Paranormal Romance)

Dear [Agent], After a harrowing night that unlocks their supernatural powers, Monica Rivera and Derek Warner must embrace their love and destinies in order to survive a secret society hell-bent on one goal: to restore their Key what does Key mean in this context? at all costs. <-- too much informat...
by Emily J
September 27th, 2011, 11:22 pm
Forum: Excerpts
Topic: First page of THE FOLLOWING (psychological thriller)
Replies: 6
Views: 2011

Re: First page of THE FOLLOWING (psychological thriller)

First page of my new novel,The Following. This goes with the query post of the same name.Any input is appreciated. Four minutes seemed like an eternity. Twice as long as it should've taken. He’d allowed for two, maybe two and a half at the most. He had planned meticulously, right down to the second...
by Emily J
September 13th, 2011, 11:41 pm
Forum: Queries
Topic: The Following: psychological thriller
Replies: 5
Views: 1247

Re: The Following: psychological thriller

Here is my revised query. Thanks for your input. Dear (agent): Tyson Palmer is a risk taker, and as a young journalist who would do anything to break his first big story, he is about to take the biggest risk of his life. <-- just my opinion, but I would cut this paragraph completely and start with ...
by Emily J
September 13th, 2011, 11:20 pm
Forum: Queries
Topic: Query"POPULATION DECLINED"
Replies: 6
Views: 1223

Re: Query"POPULATION DECLINED"

Emily, thanks for the feedback. Now before I start revising I have a few questions for you. I do agree with doing away with the ellipses (it was just starting point) but I was "ify" about them from the beginning so I will definitely throw those out. This was a bit long and I did get some advice fro...
by Emily J
September 12th, 2011, 11:39 pm
Forum: Queries
Topic: Query"POPULATION DECLINED"
Replies: 6
Views: 1223

Re: Query"POPULATION DECLINED"

This is the revision of my original query (its just the synopsis which was my main problem) any thoughts please? I appreciate the feed back. In New Orleans comma an unpiloted helicopter crashes into a lower hyphen here? class neighborhood… maybe a comma instead of ellipses? I must admit I hate thos...
by Emily J
September 4th, 2011, 7:29 pm
Forum: Queries
Topic: Query"POPULATION DECLINED"
Replies: 6
Views: 1223

Re: Query"POPULATION DECLINED"

I will do what i can to critique others but i am not sure how much help i will be because i just had my query tore apart and in my mind it was good lol. If someone can please give me their input on what they think and what improvements could be made it would be helpful. Thanks in advance, Dear (Age...
by Emily J
May 23rd, 2011, 10:05 pm
Forum: Writing
Topic: How do you write a fight scene?
Replies: 15
Views: 2574

Re: How do you write a fight scene?

One of the oldest pieces of advice batted around is the old "write what you know."

I'm not sure how many of us have actually been in a fight but all I can imagine now is a Fight Club scenario in which an author seeks out brawls to better understand the source material. lol.
by Emily J
May 23rd, 2011, 8:09 pm
Forum: Synopses and Plot Outlines
Topic: Synopsis: The Drake War
Replies: 5
Views: 3934

Re: Synopsis: The Drake War

Hmm, so I must admit I like the first synopsis better as well. The second synopsis to me had an over abundance of voice. I think that style might work in a query, but it felt a bit too much in the longer synopsis. I agree that maybe you could just consider expanding on the first synopsis. While the ...
by Emily J
May 11th, 2011, 10:22 pm
Forum: Excerpts
Topic: Existential Fiction - Loose Ideas!
Replies: 1
Views: 935

Re: Existential Fiction - Loose Ideas!

Hey, I'm really quite apprehensive towards this, as i do not know if it really belongs here. It's my first real attempt at writing something like this and it's more of an experimental 'stream-of-consciousness' type thing! Literally any feedback would be greatly appreciated, as i've exhausted a few ...
by Emily J
April 4th, 2011, 8:44 pm
Forum: Queries
Topic: BIG MOUTH BLUES, Contemporary YA query
Replies: 7
Views: 1892

Re: BIG MOUTH BLUES, Contemporary YA query

Hi, everyone. This is my 4th attempt at a query letter for Big Mouth Blues. Please feel free to tear it apart. Thank you in advance for taking the time to give me your feedback. :) I need all the help I can get. One sentence tagline: Fourteen-year-old Kacey Donovan masquerades as a normal teen want...
by Emily J
February 15th, 2011, 7:27 pm
Forum: Queries
Topic: Query: Of Shadows and Angels
Replies: 14
Views: 2821

Re: Query: Of Shadows and Angels

Hi guys. Well it's amazing what a few months away from a project and stumbling across a single sentence can do. So I've gone back re-jigged my query and I think (Hope? Pray?) I've got the wording right to get the ideas through. Under 300 words as well!! (299 to be precise...hehe) Please, leave your...
by Emily J
February 14th, 2011, 5:47 pm
Forum: Procrastination
Topic: The SQUEE GOOD NEWS Thread
Replies: 364
Views: 82331

Re: The SQUEE GOOD NEWS Thread

congrats bcomet that is awesome!!!!

And I second (quadruple?) the link request!