So Nathan is out of town this week...

[Margo]

...it don't look ta me like anyone of these light-weights would even knock over a lamp or dirty an ash tray.

Hey, come on now. It just took a little time to requisition the yak, the vaseline, and the 9 feet of rubber tubing*.

I brought a big plastic pool and some scuba gear.

Oh, cool. I need someplace to keep the soapy frogs.

ALL the cigars? I don't think so.

Well, Mira brought the pool. We'll fill it with mud, and we can wrestle for 'em. Just don't step on the frogs. We get our cigars; Mira gets her mud wrestling. And Bob's ur uncle.


(*I'm not a perv. It's an obscure video game reference.)

[Mira]

We need monkeys for this shindig. If Margo's going to bring soapy frogs, we gotta have monkeys. It's only fair.

Anyone know where Nathan keeps the monkeys?

I say we let the monkeys wrestle, while we smoke the cigars. Just don't let them near the Yak.

[Down the well]

Er...I traded the monkeys for a corndog, and now some guy in silver is eyeing me real hungry-like.

[Quill]

Wheee, this party is getting to be.....more work than writing.

[Heather B]

Loosen up a little, Quill; you got your cigars.

I'm sure Nathan would want us to party. Really. Why else wound he be out of town?*

(*now he's gone, we can go crazy with the rhetorical questions) *Evil laugh*.

[Margo]

(*now he's gone, we can go crazy with the rhetorical questions) *Evil laugh*.

You know it! I'm going to write a bunch of queries that start with some pithy statement of universal wisdom relating to my fiction novel...if I can find the monkey that ran away with Nathan's keyboard.

Er...I traded the monkeys for a corndog, and now some guy in silver is eyeing me real hungry-like.

If you intend on going joyriding, you so better take me with you. I never get to break the universe.

[Claudie]

Waaaiit, if you break the universe now, we'll never get the mud wrestling. That would be so sad.

[Mira]

I agree with Claudie. Let's hold off on breaking the universe until after the mud wrestling and the beat poetry exhibition. After hearing beat poetry for 3 hours, most of us will want the universe to swallow us up anyway, so it's all to the good.

Speaking of which, the guys from the bagpipe band are here. Where should I put them?

[Holly]

I'm here. I dragged my dog off the couch and we're here. I agree, the orange on this site has got to go. Seafoam green with flying puppies!

[r louis scott]

Well, you guys aren't such sticks in the mud after all. I take back all of the things I was thinking about you except for the guy that traded away the monkeys.

Now who wants to dance?

*jumps up on coffee table*

[Mira]

Sticks in the mud? On Nathan's forum? Not possible. By definition.

I'll dance with you R.L. I've always wanted to tango on a coffee table. Of course, I need a rose between my teeth to tango properly...but if there is no rose, I'll take a corndog instead.

[Down the well]

I tossed the place and still couldn't find any ARCs, but I did find this gem of a novel on one of the bookshelves. I don't know if it's all the brandy and cigar smoke fuzzing my head, but I tore out the bottom half of one of its pages and pinned it to the door for when Nathan gets back. I have a feeling there's going to be one serious GIANT SPACE KAPOW for all of us when he opens the door and sees the mess we've made.


"However, a good laugh is a mighty good thing, and rather too scarce a good thing; the more's the pity. So, if any one man, in his own proper person, afford stuff for a good joke to anybody, let him not be backward, but let him cheerfully allow himself to spend and be spent in that way. And the man that has anything bountifully laughable about him, be sure there is more in that man than you perhaps think for."

- Herman Melville, Moby Dick


(Damn, I gotta get those monkeys back)

[Quill]

Think I'm overdosing on bagpipe music. How can you guys dance to that stuff.

Otherwise, good times, good times.

[Margo]

(Damn, I gotta get those monkeys back)

Totally, 'cuz I wanted to enter one of the monkeys in the beat poetry contest.

Mira, I can't find roses. Here, just use this limited edition Mont Blanc fountain pen I found in a glass case on Nathan's desk. I'm sure he won't mind some teeth marks. All pens have teeth marks, right? Oh, you guys need real music!

Anyone seen a stereo? What shall it be? Nine Inch Nails - The Hand that Feeds You? Timbaland - Carry Out? Joan Jett - Bad Reputation? Green Day - American Idiot? Does the volume knob stop an 10? So sad... Oh, watch it, guys; your drinks are vibrating off the table. <shouting> I said your drinks are vibrating off the table. We don't want any party fouls.

Anyone know how to play beer pong? This antique desk over here is just the right size...

[Mira]

Okay guys, there's a collection cup in the corner to replace the antique desk and the limited edition Mont Blanc fountain pen. Guess I bit down too hard. Dig deep - a dollar doesn't go as far as it used to.

Quill and I piled what's left of the desk and coffee table in the corner. We figured a bonfire is the obvious thing to do at this point. Once Heather and Holly get back with the marshmallows, things'll get cookin'.

Oh - Margo, this policeman showed up because the vibrations from the noise are loosening the foundation. Don't worry, once he found out Nathan was a literary agent, he started to tell Down the Well all about his WIP. He's pitching him now in the corner.

PAAAARTY!