Wackiest "advice"/comments you've gotten from non-writers

[craig]

Here is the worst comment I have ever come across...

"You can't be a good writer because you aren't hooked on drugs or alcohol and you don't smoke"

UM? Really?

Hahahaha!

I don't work as a teacher, but studied to be one while in university. During my last student teaching placement, I went to the staff Christmas Party -- one of the teachers (social studies, I think) started talking to me...

"So, Craig, can I buy you a drink?"

"No, thanks, I don't drink."

"Like, ever?"

"Never -- never have and don't plan to start."

"Really? Cuz to survive as a teacher you need an addiction of some sort -- alcohol, cigarettes, gambling, cocaine -- doesn't matter as long as you've got an addiction!"

[dios4vida]

"Really? Cuz to survive as a teacher you need an addiction of some sort -- alcohol, cigarettes, gambling, cocaine -- doesn't matter as long as you've got an addiction!"

"Actually, I'm addicted to the highs of a good plot arc, the lows of a protaganist's struggling, and the overall madness of this process called 'writing.'"

[theepicwinner]

"Really? Cuz to survive as a teacher you need an addiction of some sort -- alcohol, cigarettes, gambling, cocaine -- doesn't matter as long as you've got an addiction!"

"Actually, I'm addicted to the highs of a good plot arc, the lows of a protaganist's struggling, and the overall madness of this process called 'writing.'"

Yes!

[Wolfe3141]

"Actually, I'm addicted to the highs of a good plot arc, the lows of a protaganist's struggling, and the overall madness of this process called 'writing.'"

I will have to remember this one ... great response! :)

[Mike Dickson]

"you're such a nerd."

But it sounded like this

"yer sucha nerd."

[cheekychook]

I have a great example of a very sweet, well-meaning, supportive comment....that made me close my eyes and count to ten before I could respond to it.

A non-writing, voracious reader friend of mine, who read my entire WIP 2 months ago, launched into the following tirade on the phone with me when I told her I hadn't queried yet because I'm still rewriting/editing:

"What do you mean you still haven't sent it out? What are you editing? I liked it the way it was when I read it---don't take any words out!!! Anyone who reads it will love all the words!! Stop working on it and send it already!"

I love her enthusiasm---really---but she's so tenacious and adamant---it's exhausting trying to explain the facts to her when she argues with all of them!

[writer4ever]

I'm a month or so away from completing my FINAL editing, and as a little break, I decided to work on my synopsis. I couldn't get it shorter than three-and-a-half pages, so I ask my mom to read it and tell me what she thought I should cut. Well, God bless her, but she thought I should cut everything that made my story ORIGINAL! (Yeah, mom! Great! That makes it sound like EVERY book on the shelf now or that has ever been on a shelf.)

(I have to say she was great about it! I explained why I couldn't cut this or that [mainly that I wanted an agent to actually CONSIDER my book], and then she understood and actually pointed out what could be cut that made it sound the SAME as every other book! My mom's a gem!)