YA Query—FB
Posted: November 9th, 2012, 1:41 am
Hi everyone.
I was hoping I could get some feedback on this query. Particularly, I'm wondering if the plot is clear. But any other advice in general is much appreciated. Thanks in advance!
Dear ,
There is another world inside Facebook—a place where people come into existence when their real-world counterparts start an account. People aren’t supposed to get inside, but when seventeen-year-old tech head Coulter Parra finds a clunky, old-fashioned computer in his kitchen, it sucks him in. Coulter has nothing but a camcorder and cell phone in hand, but in FB, these everyday items become treasures.
Zero is the despot of Facebook. A tyrant with total control, he is untouchable, riding high above the masses on a machine that keeps him out of reach. He wants to know how Coulter got inside. If you die in FB, you die in real life, and Zero will kill Coulter’s friends and family, unless Coulter agrees to help fix this glitch. But that means he’ll be tortured, thrown in the Design Chair, and inevitably killed.
Coulter can’t let his family get murdered, and he won’t submit to torture. His video camera burns holes through Zero’s guards, and his phone lets his wounds heal rapidly, boosts his speed to move in a blur, and immerses the world in darkness that only he can penetrate—but none of this may be enough. He discovers three anomalies, people who got inside like him. Those in FB hate their dictator, the anomalies have been waiting for a chance to take out Zero, and in Coulter—with his phone and camera—they finally have power to be a threat. They have to kill Zero, and then—maybe—Coulter can find a way out.
FB is a YA fantasy novel, complete at 83,000 words. I have a novella coming out this year with Eirelander Publishing.
Thank you for your consideration.
Taylor Napolsky
I was hoping I could get some feedback on this query. Particularly, I'm wondering if the plot is clear. But any other advice in general is much appreciated. Thanks in advance!
Dear ,
There is another world inside Facebook—a place where people come into existence when their real-world counterparts start an account. People aren’t supposed to get inside, but when seventeen-year-old tech head Coulter Parra finds a clunky, old-fashioned computer in his kitchen, it sucks him in. Coulter has nothing but a camcorder and cell phone in hand, but in FB, these everyday items become treasures.
Zero is the despot of Facebook. A tyrant with total control, he is untouchable, riding high above the masses on a machine that keeps him out of reach. He wants to know how Coulter got inside. If you die in FB, you die in real life, and Zero will kill Coulter’s friends and family, unless Coulter agrees to help fix this glitch. But that means he’ll be tortured, thrown in the Design Chair, and inevitably killed.
Coulter can’t let his family get murdered, and he won’t submit to torture. His video camera burns holes through Zero’s guards, and his phone lets his wounds heal rapidly, boosts his speed to move in a blur, and immerses the world in darkness that only he can penetrate—but none of this may be enough. He discovers three anomalies, people who got inside like him. Those in FB hate their dictator, the anomalies have been waiting for a chance to take out Zero, and in Coulter—with his phone and camera—they finally have power to be a threat. They have to kill Zero, and then—maybe—Coulter can find a way out.
FB is a YA fantasy novel, complete at 83,000 words. I have a novella coming out this year with Eirelander Publishing.
Thank you for your consideration.
Taylor Napolsky