How's this query grab ya? NOBODY'S FOOL
Posted: April 2nd, 2015, 2:35 pm
Which is better-- the long query or the short one??
(Short)
Dear Mr. Bransford,
With the passing of Sir Terry Pratchett, a great octarine light has gone out of the world, and his legion of fans are cast into the darkness.
Maybe you can offer them a match: my 80,000 word comic fantasy NOBODY'S FOOL.
In the Whellen Country, the Florentine Renaissance, Elizabethan England and free mechanical power mash up to create a land that’s bursting with innovation and prosperity. But all that is about to end, unless its ruler can curry serious favor with an unhappy King. She thinks a magical stranger was sent to help her, but it’s really the disgraced royal jester— with a talking magpie on one shoulder and a chip on the other.
I've written advertising copy since 1992. Take pity upon me.
Eva Sandor
(Long)
Dear Mr Bransford,
For 20 years, Malfred Murd was the royal jester...until an over-ripe wisecrack got him exiled from the King’s palace on the Isle of Gold. Sure, you’re never supposed to explain humor. But after a whiff of life on the dirt streets of the mainland, “Fred” is desperate to try. It isn’t much of a quest— but to an unlicensed fool, it could make the difference between life (potentially cushy) and death (either from starvation, or a fatal arse-kicking by territorial buskers).
Then Fred spots what he thinks will be a free ride back home.
Dame Elsebet de Whellen might be 70 years old, but she can still rip it up with sword and spear. And that’s good because she’s on a quest, too... a mission to save her prosperous, technologically advanced country from ruin. She’s headed for the Isle of Gold— and needs someone to help her out with a little sorcery.
Fred’s theatrical skills convince Dame Elsebet that he’s the spell-casting sidekick she prayed for. But if she finds out he’s lying, she’ll slice him into precisely equal pieces.
That already exceeds even the bravest fool’s danger quota. But it’s too late to back out, and it’s going to get worse. Because the real danger is hiding in plain sight: an evil far more monstrous than Fred, or Dame Elsebet, or even the King, could possibly imagine.
NOBODY’S FOOL is an 80,000 word comic fantasy.
It’s my first novel.
(Short)
Dear Mr. Bransford,
With the passing of Sir Terry Pratchett, a great octarine light has gone out of the world, and his legion of fans are cast into the darkness.
Maybe you can offer them a match: my 80,000 word comic fantasy NOBODY'S FOOL.
In the Whellen Country, the Florentine Renaissance, Elizabethan England and free mechanical power mash up to create a land that’s bursting with innovation and prosperity. But all that is about to end, unless its ruler can curry serious favor with an unhappy King. She thinks a magical stranger was sent to help her, but it’s really the disgraced royal jester— with a talking magpie on one shoulder and a chip on the other.
I've written advertising copy since 1992. Take pity upon me.
Eva Sandor
(Long)
Dear Mr Bransford,
For 20 years, Malfred Murd was the royal jester...until an over-ripe wisecrack got him exiled from the King’s palace on the Isle of Gold. Sure, you’re never supposed to explain humor. But after a whiff of life on the dirt streets of the mainland, “Fred” is desperate to try. It isn’t much of a quest— but to an unlicensed fool, it could make the difference between life (potentially cushy) and death (either from starvation, or a fatal arse-kicking by territorial buskers).
Then Fred spots what he thinks will be a free ride back home.
Dame Elsebet de Whellen might be 70 years old, but she can still rip it up with sword and spear. And that’s good because she’s on a quest, too... a mission to save her prosperous, technologically advanced country from ruin. She’s headed for the Isle of Gold— and needs someone to help her out with a little sorcery.
Fred’s theatrical skills convince Dame Elsebet that he’s the spell-casting sidekick she prayed for. But if she finds out he’s lying, she’ll slice him into precisely equal pieces.
That already exceeds even the bravest fool’s danger quota. But it’s too late to back out, and it’s going to get worse. Because the real danger is hiding in plain sight: an evil far more monstrous than Fred, or Dame Elsebet, or even the King, could possibly imagine.
NOBODY’S FOOL is an 80,000 word comic fantasy.
It’s my first novel.