Search found 15 matches
- October 5th, 2012, 3:00 pm
- Forum: Queries
- Topic: Revised Query for THE FINAL CLUE
- Replies: 16
- Views: 9312
Re: Revised Query for THE FINAL CLUE. Tried a different approach
Hi All, would appreciate your thoughts and critique with this newest attempt. As always, I appreciate your help. Thanks, Cheryl Dear Agent, FBI agent Gina Russo wants to slam the person who's threatening her life into a wall spiked with nails. But there’s a problem: she doesn't know who the bastard ...
- September 25th, 2012, 12:48 pm
- Forum: Queries
- Topic: Query critique for THE FINAL CLUE
- Replies: 2
- Views: 14056
Query critique for THE FINAL CLUE
Dear Mr. Bransford, FBI agent Gina Russo wants to slam the person threatening her life into a wall spiked with nails, but she doesn't know who the bastard is or why he wants her dead. Top-notch, agent Joey Zicara is assigned as Gina’s partner when bizarre poems containing enigmatic clues arrive at h...
- September 13th, 2012, 12:50 pm
- Forum: Queries
- Topic: MG: Under Sentinel Guard - Which Query Do You Like?
- Replies: 8
- Views: 5011
Re: MG: Under Sentinel Guard - Which Query Do You Like?
Hello Shipple, I like the premise of your story, but I think your trying to get too many details in the query. I played with it a little. It's only a suggestion to break it up some. I don't know your story, but this is what I came up with to show you another direction you might want to try. I hope y...
- September 10th, 2012, 10:34 am
- Forum: Queries
- Topic: Revised Query for THE FINAL CLUE
- Replies: 16
- Views: 9312
Re: Revised Query for THE FINAL CLUE
Hello Kelsey,
Thank you very much for your critique. Your help is greatly appreciated.
Cheryl
Thank you very much for your critique. Your help is greatly appreciated.
Cheryl
- September 5th, 2012, 9:17 am
- Forum: Queries
- Topic: Revised Query for THE FINAL CLUE
- Replies: 16
- Views: 9312
Re: Tried on new approach with the query fo THE FINAL CLUE
Hello everyone and thank again for your help. I'm hoping this one puts me closer as I'm about to complete the final polish of my novel. I would appreciate any critique to push me in the right direction. Thanks again, Cheryl Dear Agent, Police officer Gina Russo and her fellow officers at the crime s...
- August 21st, 2012, 11:28 am
- Forum: Queries
- Topic: Revised Query for THE FINAL CLUE
- Replies: 16
- Views: 9312
Re: Revised Query for THE FINAL CLUE. Another attempt
I've read over and over all the great advice. Hope this one does it. Thanks in advance for all your help. Dear Agent, Seven years ago, Officer Gina Russo fired a shot in self-defense. It triggered an explosion that incinerated career criminal William Nicolas Mancuso. At least, that’s what she though...
- August 20th, 2012, 7:45 am
- Forum: Queries
- Topic: Revised Query for THE FINAL CLUE
- Replies: 16
- Views: 9312
Re: Revised Query for THE FINAL CLUE
Hello Garnell, Thank you and welcome to the site. I'm new myself, but finding the members here are so informative and helpful. I'm working on the query some more, but need to be careful not to be so wordy, lol, which I tend to be at times. From what I understand about query's, Agents like them tight...
- July 26th, 2012, 8:08 am
- Forum: Queries
- Topic: Revised Query for THE FINAL CLUE
- Replies: 16
- Views: 9312
Re: Revised Query for THE FINAL CLUE
Thank you Shipple and Chounzat,
I appreciate your input. I'm considering all critiques and thank you Chounzat for th compliment. I think I'm getting closer to having a query that works.
Thanks again,
Cheryl
I appreciate your input. I'm considering all critiques and thank you Chounzat for th compliment. I think I'm getting closer to having a query that works.
Thanks again,
Cheryl
- July 21st, 2012, 12:03 pm
- Forum: Queries
- Topic: Revised Query for THE FINAL CLUE
- Replies: 16
- Views: 9312
Re: Revised Query for THE FINAL CLUE
Hello Chounzat,
Thank you very much. I feel like I'm fianlly getting there.
No, I haven't read that, but now that you mentioned the book by Nora Roberts, as soon as I can find the time, I'll check it out.
Thanks again,
Cheryl
Thank you very much. I feel like I'm fianlly getting there.
No, I haven't read that, but now that you mentioned the book by Nora Roberts, as soon as I can find the time, I'll check it out.
Thanks again,
Cheryl
- July 19th, 2012, 10:58 am
- Forum: Queries
- Topic: Revised Query for THE FINAL CLUE
- Replies: 16
- Views: 9312
Re: Revised Query for THE FINAL CLUE
Hello idenelly and LurkinVirogist, thank you both for your input and critique. I revised hoping this satisfies what was questioned and hope it’s helped improved the query. Dear Agent, Seven years ago, officer Gina Russo fired a shot in self-defense. It triggered the explosion believed to have incine...
- July 18th, 2012, 10:17 pm
- Forum: Queries
- Topic: Revised Query for THE FINAL CLUE
- Replies: 16
- Views: 9312
Revised Query for THE FINAL CLUE
Hello, I revised my original query and hoping this one is much improved. I would appreciate your help Thank you, Cheryl Seven years ago, officer Gina Russo fired a shot in self-defense, causing an explosion, which killed career criminal William Nicholas Mancuso. That's what Gina was led to believe f...
- July 10th, 2012, 6:52 am
- Forum: Queries
- Topic: Seeking help with my query for THE FINAL CLUE
- Replies: 6
- Views: 3303
Re: Seeking help with my query for THE FINAL CLUE
Hello Liz,
I like what you did. Thank you for taking the time to play with it. It's so nice to know there's people who are genuine and want to help. I hope I'm good enough one day to return the favor.
Thanks again,
Cheryl
I like what you did. Thank you for taking the time to play with it. It's so nice to know there's people who are genuine and want to help. I hope I'm good enough one day to return the favor.
Thanks again,
Cheryl
- July 7th, 2012, 12:12 pm
- Forum: Queries
- Topic: Seeking help with my query for THE FINAL CLUE
- Replies: 6
- Views: 3303
Re: Seeking help with my query for THE FINAL CLUE
Hello Macaroni, Yes, blink QS. I wanted to test out a new angle. Last post from QS made me feel like I am finally getting closer. Thank you for the critique. I realized after I posted, I missed a word or two, that happened when I backed space t fix something and didn't realize I didn't but the word ...
- July 4th, 2012, 9:29 pm
- Forum: Queries
- Topic: Seeking help with my query for THE FINAL CLUE
- Replies: 6
- Views: 3303
Seeking help with my query for THE FINAL CLUE
Hi, I'm new to this site. I'm seeking help with my query. I would appreciate if you could help decide which way to go or start all over. I have to queries. Not sure which one to continue working on. Thanks in advance for your help. Cheryl Query 1 Dear Agent, FBI agent Gina Russo cannot wait to get h...
- July 4th, 2012, 9:22 pm
- Forum: Queries
- Topic: Query: The Pawn
- Replies: 7
- Views: 3545
Re: Query: The Pawn
Hello Merry, I'm new to the site. Although your story sounds interesting, it's a little confusing to me. (just my opinion). About Query Shark. You were offered great advice. Definitly check that out. Janey Reid's critiques are very informative, but you need to be able to take the critiques in a posi...