Nathan Bransford - The Forums

Hi Steve, I think this looks great. You get a strong sense of the character and the setting. Since I have no structural comments, I'll just note that I think you're looking for "there" rather than "their" in the first sentence of the last full paragraph. And you might consider ma...

Thanks Trw! I'll send you a note as well. It's relatively short, after this last round of revisions, it should come in around 55K.

Thanks! I sent you a message to arrange a swap. - SI

I agree, I think the story sounds compelling, and for this query I would work on beginning with and maintaining a more active voice: When the crops fail on the Bleamy family farm during the drought of 1802, eleven-year-old Jeremy Bleamy and his parents are forced to leave their belongings, their dog...

Well this seems to be the saddest category on the forum in terms of responses, but I'll give it a shot just in case. I'm in the final stages of preparing my manuscript before sending it out to agents and would love to have some objective feedback from someone interested in multiple perspective liter...